


Sparks in the Sky

by Thalianix



Series: Sky and Horizons Series [2]
Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-10
Updated: 2018-10-03
Packaged: 2019-06-08 01:02:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 29
Words: 37,393
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15231936
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thalianix/pseuds/Thalianix
Summary: This is the prequel to "Fire on the Horizon."  Sparks in the Sky details the story of Garrus Vakarian and Jane Shepard through Mass Effect 2 into the beginning of Fire on the Horizon.





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> This is the prequel to Fire on the Horizon. The story will be long because it is a walkthrough of ME2 with "missing" portions of the story like private scenes between Garrus and Jane. This is what lead them from friendship to the romance that we all love. I hope you like it and I thank you if you are coming here from Fire on the Horizon. You can also follow me on Twitter for updates to chapters and updates on new fan fiction.

Prologue

"Garrus Vakarian. Garrus Vakarian. Room 423." 

The automated voice came through the waiting area where Garrus and several other potential Spectre trainees were waiting. They were waiting for various interviews that would determine who would make it to the final training stages and who would be returning back to their normal lives and jobs. This was the last interview for Garrus. He had made it through every other interview and training simulator. He had aced every single aspect, so far. 

He stood up and tossed his coffee cup into the trash as he walked down the long hallway. Room 423 was almost at the end of the hallway to the left. Just a few feet from a staircase that lead to the council chambers. He felt himself move stiffly through the hallway. Part of it was the clothing. He hated the dress uniform he had to wear for these things. It was stiff, confining, and it made him feel like he was getting ready for coffin. The other reason he felt stiff today was because of the lack of sleep he was getting. 

It had only been a few weeks since his mother had been diagnosed with end stage Corpalis Syndrome. Truth be told he wanted to be home. He wanted to spend as much time as he could there and not doing this garbage that was expected of him. He was tired of doing what was the "right thing for a Turian" to do. He wished he was still serving with Shepard.

Oh, the take down of Saren had been great. Afterwards though, the Alliance had no place for him on the Normandy and because of his efforts, Spectre training was pushed again. So, here he was. Dressed in a stiff funeral suit walking down a hallway to answer questions.

He tapped the door twice and heard a muffled "come in". He stepped in and stood at attention in front of the panel of five. 

"At ease Agent."

Garrus went to an immediate at ease and waited for the questions. They went well, until the he saw his green and blue file get passed between the five members of the panel. A turian in the middle of the table looked up at him and folded his hands. 

"Garrus, your military and service jacket is...impressive. Top of your military class, top choice for a C-Sec position, rose to Agent within a matter of months, only a few issues, then you left. You just left everything to join the Normandy on a fight against Saren. Is that correct?"

Garrus took a deep breath and thought about the best way to handle the question. He sighed and answered the way he wanted to. 

"I didn't just leave. I had started an investigation against Saren that had gone on for months. I was put off again and again. Shepard came in with the same target. I had a choice. Go after the Turian that was hell bent on going against everything Turians stand for or stay at C-Sec and keep pushing papers and booking low level red sand dealers until I died. I decided to serve my people."

A female Turian smirked. "Your people or yourself Agent Vakarian."

Garrus almost snarled at her. Before he could respond another member of the panel spoke up. This was an Asari. "Agent Vakarian, I assume you know the current status of Shepard and of the outlook on this issue with Saren and the other colorful things that Shepard has come up with from her so called visions?"

Garrus did growl that time. "I know what I saw with my own eyes while I served with the Commander on the Normandy."

He let that rest for a few moments. The first panel member finally spoke. 

"Garrus, you have everything on paper that makes it suitable for you to be the next Turian spectre. With that being said, you have everything in reality to make you unsuitable. Our concern is that, as a spectre, you will go with your gut too often over the right thing. That you will use your status to do it your way. What say you to that?"

Garrus took in a deep breath and began to answer.

 

Five Hours Later

"So, it turns out that saying "I say fuck off" is not the response to give the spectre candidate panel when asked what say you to that." Garrus smirked into his drink and downed in. 

Sitting across from him was Liara. She shook her head and laughed a little. "Garrus. You had to know what was going to happen?"

Garrus held his hand up and flagged the bartender for another drink. He looked at his friend and shook his head. 

"Liara, I don't even know what I'm doing anymore. I never wanted this. It was the right thing to do. I feel like ever since Saren was taken down I am just like a fish out of water. I don't want to back to C-Sec and I don't want to go with Spectre training. Part of me wants to go home. I just don't know."

Liara nodded as she listened. "Is there anything you can do? Talk to Shepard maybe?"

He sighed. "I did. She said that I would know what was right for me. Apparently the Alliance has her running all over the back of the galaxy doing bullshit missions while they decide if she is a risk or not."

Liara sighed heavily. She was afraid that the Alliance was on their way to making Shepard the scapegoat for so many things that had been building. She was about to speak when she noticed Garrus sit straight up and look at the news that cut into the latest ball game. The bartender turned it up as the room fell silent.

A news broadcaster from Earth was sitting behind a small desk. She looked pale and in shock. Her hands were shaking. 

"It was just been reported to the Alliance News Network that approximately three hours ago, the….the…" She stammered over her words.

An image of Shepard came on the screen and Liara gasped as she grabbed Garrus' arm. 

The newscaster started again. "Approximately three hours ago Alliance News time, Commander Shepard and the crew of the SSV Normandy were attacked by an unknown attacker. An unknown portion of the crew deployed in life pods. Commander Jane Shepard was the last to leave the ship and according to members of the crew, did not survive. She was killed during the explosion of the Normandy. We have the following vid footage from one of the pods."

The image cut and went to a silent video of the Normandy exploding. Garrus felt his knees go out as he grabbed the table. Liara fell back into her seat, her eyes filling with tears. At that moment, Garrus felt his entire world shift.


	2. Times They are Changing

The memorial service was beautiful. Joker sat by Garrus and Wrex while Liara sat closer to Tali, Kaidan, and some others. People spoke, including Shepards mother. Garrus found himself smiling a bit as a small slide show of Jane as a child was played. There was a joke that Jane would take apart her toy gun and put it back together in the dark, just because she could. There was one picture that took him by surprise. It was of her in her early military years. She was in track apparently. The picture was of her, with hair past her shoulders in soft black curls. She was looking away from the camera and sat on a bench. She was in track shorts and a tank top. Garrus had a fleeting moment where he wished he had known her then. 

Following the memorial, several people met at the bar to drink in Jane's honor. Joker showed up for a few minutes, but bolted out. Wrex refused to believe she was gone and he took the first shuttle out of the Citadel. Garrus decided to drink alone, in his apartment, as he watched something no one knew he had.

He closed the blinds, sat down on his sofa, opened a bottle of Batarian Shard Wine, and clicked the remote. The flat screen lit up and filled the room with light. Garrus smiled at the image. It was Jane. She was on a stage on some god forsaken planet they were on during the search for Saren. She was a little drunk and had a microphone in her hand. A voice, Joker's specifically, could be heard from somewhere behind the person filming. 

"Please God let her sing better than she dances!!!"

She turned and flipped him off. Reaching up she flicked her wrist and her hair tie was on her wrist as her hell fell around her shoulders. Garrus stared at the screen for a moment and frowned slightly. Taking a pull off the wine he watched the rest of the vid, rewinded it, played it back, rinse and repeat. 

He woke up the next morning on his sofa with one hell of a hangover. He clanked through the bottles around the sofa and into the bathroom. A shower didn't help at all, even when he cranked the heat up. He got out and swiped a towel covered hand over the mirror. He looked like he had aged twenty years. He looked at the eyes staring back at him. 

"Fuck it." 

He walked out of the bathroom, got dressed, and started packing. A few hours later he was standing at the docking bay for all flights leaving the Citadel. He had his casual clothing on, the turian equivalent to jeans, a black turian t-shirt, and a soft jacket. He had two duffle bags. One with his guns and one with clothing and personal items. He stood in line waiting to board when he felt a clap on his back.

"Hey big guy. Where ya headed?"

Garrus turned to see Joker standing behind him. Well, standing partially anyway. 

Garrus turned and smiled at him as he looked at the ticket griped in his hand. "I dunno. Somewhere, anywhere, anywhere but here. You?"

"Oh, the council has requested us all to go to different stations. Apparently we are all being quarented and questioned about what happened. So, you know, I get to go sit in front of a panel on Earth and be told how it was all my fault again. Good times." Joker looked pissed, but also upset. 

Garrus took a breath and sat down his duffle bag since the line wasn't moving anyway. Joker noticed the bag was partially open and there was a frame on top.

"Jeff, it wasn't your fault. None of it was your fault. Even if you had stayed behind, she would have been gone. The impact alone. You did what you could and you followed the last order she gave you. No one blames you." 

Jeff knew Garrus meant and believed what he said. "Yeah, Alenko does. I know he does."

Garrus nodded and made a sort of chuckle sound. "Yeah, well Alenko blames a lot of people for a lot of things. Don't let it get to you."

The line began to move again and Garrus bent down to get his bag. The zipper opened more and the picture showed. Joker's eyes widened. It was a picture of Shepard, but not one he had ever seen. No, this one was private. She was sitting at a bar. She had on a black silk shirt that was loose and had peek a boo shoulders. She was smiling. Not the one she gave to reporters or to the council. This was a true blue smile. Her hair was cupped around her face and her hand was against her cheek. It was beautiful. She was beautiful. Even Jeff had to admit that.

He looked from the picture to Garrus. Garrus looked embarrassed for a moment. Like he was going to try to come up with a bullshit reason for having it. Instead, he went with the dead truth.

"I took it one of the nights after Saren was taken down. Anderson took us out for drinks. She didn't know I got it." He stopped and took a deep swallow and breath before continuing. 

"It doesn't matter now, so why not say it right? I started to care for her. More than a friend. More than I should. I had no right. I had no chance is what I had. The night I saw Kaidan go to her quarters, well, I didn't need a picture to get the point. I may not have had a chance, but I still wanted to have that moment. So, I took the picture. It's all I have left of her. That's the truth. She grounded me when I didn't know I needed it. She kept me centered. Without her….anyway."

Jeff had never heard Garrus like this before. He nodded. He had to admit, he could see where the big guy was coming from. They all loved her in one way or another. Jeff had a crush on her at first himself. Then he realized she was like a sister to him. He felt protective of her and that's where it stayed. He nodded at Garrus and followed him onto the shuttle. They talked for a bit about good times before they finally separated at the third shuttle. 

The shuttle dock was on Omega. Jeff couldn't wait to leave that place. Garrus on the other hand decided to have a drink and bunk on Omega for the night before leaving.

As it turned out, on his way to dinner from his hotel, he came up on an elderly human couple. They were getting in their skycar and had been approached by two gang members. Blue Suns to be specific. Garrus stopped the attack and saved the couple. As he was trying to leave they thanked him. He smiled.

"No problem. Just be safe getting back to your place." Garrus said kindly in a voice that sounded much like his old C-Sec days.

The woman smiled at him and touched his arm. "No, son. You were our angel tonight. Our archangel."

She got in the skycar with her husband and left. Garrus took in the moment, looked around the area, and smiled. "Yeah, a real Archangel."


	3. Have You Heard of an Angel?

Shepard sat in the Captain's Cabin of the new and improved Cerberus remodeled Normandy. The SR-2, they had named it. She was in a Cerberus uniform with Cerberus gear surrounding her. The bed was nice. She had to give them that. Everything in the cabin was done for her convenience and comfort. It drove her crazy. 

She heard a beep at the door and looked up from her elbows on knees stance on the bed. 

"Come in." She said in less of a Commander Shepard tone and more of a Jane tone. She smiled when she saw Joker come in. She actually made an audible sigh of relief.

"Commander." He said in his usual professional tone that he used with her in the cockpit.

She stood and folded her arms, cocking an eyebrow. 

"Jane. Sorry. Just…" He took a breath. It was the first time they had been alone and able to talk since she had been back. Before she died they had become close. Nothing out of the ordinary, but really close friends. They would sit in her cabin and watch the game, hang out, go for drinks. 

She took in a breath and watched him for a moment and within just a few seconds she was across the room hugging him. He gently hugged her back and she could feel his shoulders sink. It was a moment later when he finally said softly, "I watched you die."

She rubbed his back gently then stepped back from the embrace. "And you can watch me live. Right in front of you. It's still me Jeff."

She turned to sit down on the sofa as Jeff walked over and sat down in a chair...gently.

"Two years Jeff. Two. I looked up some of the old crew last night." She glanced over at the computer monitor in her office area. When she looked back Jeff was smirking. 

"What?"

"You know what. Come on. Let it out. What did you find on Garrus?" He smiled and leaned back in the chair waiting on her response.

"Nothing. I didn't find anything. I even had EDI check. He left from the Citadel after leaving the spectre training and that was the last anyone saw or heard from him. Joker, that was right after I died." She got quiet and looked down at the coffee table for a moment. 

Joker looked down and back at her. "Jane, I need to tell you something. Do you remember that poker game we had two weeks before the attack?"

Jane thought about it for a minute. She remembered that a few weeks before the attack that killed her, they had a full night of poker. Kaidan had gone to bed very early, in his own bunk. By the end of the night poker turned into the cards in their hands and Jane, Joker, and Liara talking. That lead to a very adult game of truth or dare that turned out to be a total ambush of truth rather than dare. One of the questions was something about the biggest regret when it came to dating. Jane had answered Garrus. Liara and Joker weren't surprised. Jane went on to admit that she had started to having feelings for him. She had flirted, but it wasn't received well. She turned her attentions to Kaidan not for love, but just out of being lonely. Her biggest regret was never telling Garrus how she felt. 

"Yeah, I remember it. Why?" She sat back and reached behind her to get a beer out of the mini-fridge that Cerberus had provided. She offered one to Jeff and passed it to him when he nodded.

He took a pull off the beer and sat back. "Well, he showed up to your memorial. Not a surprise right? What shocked me was a day or so later. I was leaving the Citadel. The Alliance called me for questioning about what had happened with the attack. I had to go to Earth to meet with the panel. I get up to the line waiting to board and Garrus is right in front of me. He was in civilian clothes which shocked me and had a bag with him. Come to find out that he had left spectre training and was headed, well somewhere. His bag opens up and I see a picture. It was a picture of you. It's not my place to say this Jane, but I think he felt the same way about you."

Joker knew he was keeping a major detail out of the story, but he was gauging what Jane would say. He was protective of her and he didn't want her hopes getting up. Especially now.

Jane nodded and seemed to take it all in. "Well, I suppose that's good to know. But…"

"But?" Joker took another pull off the beer.

"It's been two years. Just like with everything fucking else. It's been two years. Two years and too long. By now he is either with someone that he deserves and is happy or he is...well...dead. Either way, it is what it is." She took a long pull off the beer and leaned back.

Joker nodded and decided to drop it. This whole thing had been rough on Jane. He couldn't imagine getting spaced, suffocating, "dying", and then waking up to being alive two years later. Everyone you knew and everything you knew was dead or moved on and to you it's only been a day. He shook off the creep factor of the feeling. Jane finally spoke up.

"So, this dossier pick up thing the Illusive Man has us doing. The next one is on Omega, actually the next several are. Do you know the doctor Mordin Solus?" She asked as she glanced at the tablet. 

Joker shook his head. "No, never heard of him before. What about the other name? What was it again?"

She handed him the dossier and sat back grabbing another beer. "Archangel. That's all it says really. Nothing about him other than that. He showed up on Omega a little over a year or so ago. He lead a gang of mercenaries. He is a crack shot, smart, and no family to speak of. In fact, there isn't even a solid description of him."

Joker looked over the dossier. He shook his head. "No idea. Sounds like someone you'd like though. Disregards the rules, knows their way around firearms, runs a gang."

She laughed. "I don't run a gang!?!"

Joker laughed. "Oh really? You ever looked around at us? You stole a ship and we stood behind you. What would you call that?"

Shepard smiled. "Negotiating tactic."

They both laughed and finished their beers. Joker left a few hours later and set the course for Omega.


	4. Shots Fired

Garrus was getting tired. The more his exhaustion grew, the smarter his opponents seemed to become. He had been at this for days. The hideout had been bombed and his team killed a little over a week ago. Garrus had given as proper burial or memorial as he could for his team members. After that, he wrote letters to the families. When the final one was sent, he went on an all out warpath. If he was honest with himself it was a death wish. 

In the last four years his life had totally changed. Four years ago, he had a nice apartment on the Citadel. He had a decent paying job with C-Sec, a savings account that actually had a balance, a sky car that was nice, an Asari girlfriend, and extra money in his pocket. He wasn't exactly happy at C-Sec, but he wasn't exactly unhappy either. Six months later he started the case on Saren. Almost immediately, the girlfriend broke up with him. No real hard feelings there. It wasn't a relationship that was really going anywhere anyway. She was nice enough, but that was about it. They had nothing in common except the bedroom. 

Six months after he started the investigation on Saren, Commander Jane Shepard showed up. Within a matter of days he had dropped C-Sec, joined up with the human spectre, and went after Saren full-time. Over that time, he grew to know the crew and become friends with a few of them. He learned more about himself and what he believed versus what he was raised to believe in his culture and even to a degree in his family. By the time they reached Virmire, Garrus was friends with a Krogran and a Qurian. He was also friends with a human and starting to feel things that he thought might be beyond friendship.

All that changed when Saren was taken down. Within a matter of weeks everyone had spread to the four winds as it where. Garrus ended up leaving spectre training, landed on Omega, and started a new life. It was good for awhile. He felt like he was making some kind of difference. Then this happened. Now, he was on a knee and sniping anything that came down the plank to him. Unfortunately, he wasn't going to be able to hold out much longer. He was running out of ammo. He was tired. 

He closed his eyes for a minute and thought of Shepard. Flashes of memories of laughing, playing poker, talking, and even her splashing water at him on Virmire came to mind. He smiled to himself. The thought of being able to meet her in the bar and catching up for eternity gave him peace. He took a deep breath and contacted his father through the omnitool. 

It didn't take long for his father to realize the gravity of the situation. "As long as you have on bullet, you can get the job done. Garrus? Come home when you are done with your target practice. We can talk."

Garrus took a breath, he was down to his last 10 bullets. He opened his eyes and refocused into the scope. His breath stopped, his heart stopped, and he sat motionless. There in the site was Shepard. He saw the Cerberus insignia first. When he panned up for a headshot, she came into focus. 

"Dad? Things just started to look up. I'll talk to you soon."

He disconnected the call and switched to concussive shots. Smirking he watched her walk a bit slowly, too slowly for his taste. He pulled the trigger sending a concussive round into her shoulder. She started moving then. It didn't take long for her to make her way through the mercenaries below and up the stairs to where he was perched. Waiting. 

 

"Archangel?" Her voice was like music to his ears. He smiled behind his helmet. He was about to stand when he caught the glimpse of a merc. Holding up his finger quietly he did the signal for "just a minute" and took aim. One shot, one kill. Done and done. He put the butt end of his rifle down on the ground and used it stand up slowly. He was going to walk to her, hell he wanted to run to her. His stiff legs and joints wouldn't let him right then. He decided to sit back on some crates and look at her. He took her in for a moment from behind his helmet before removing it.

Putting the helmet down to his side he smiled. "Shepard. I thought you were dead." The words came out with a sigh of relief and exhaustion. 

Shepard was stuck between shock and disbelief. Archangel, the latest member of her dossier list and potential crew member, was Garrus Vakarian himself.

"Garrus! What are you doing here?"

After a quick explanation, and a lot of relief, Shepard was somewhat caught up. The goal now was to get Garrus out of this mess, get him safely back to the Normandy, then they could catch up. If only it had been that easy. Just as they were about to be free of everything and out of the hideout, Garrus was hit with a rocket. 

"Garrus!" Shepard ran to him. She was hyper focused on him, on the thought that she finally had her best friend back, and now he was dying on the floor in front of her. She could vaguely here the voices around her saying he wasn't going to make it and that he was bleeding out. Her heart was racing and sinking at the same time. 

They managed to get him back to the Normandy and get Dr. Chakwas to him. It all happened so fast. Shepard stepped out of the clinic and headed to the conference room. She listened to reports, listened to what a Commander listens to, and acted as if she cared. She may be out of the room, but her mind and spirit was in that clinic with Garrus. 

When everyone left her alone for a few minutes, she leaned on the console. "Please, Spirits, let him be okay."


	5. Scars and Krogans

Garrus stood up slowly from the med bay bed. He was groggy from the pain meds and medi gel that had been used liberally on him. Chakwas stood behind him as he glanced in the mirror. He winced inwardly, but kept as stoic of an expression as possible. Well, this wasn't going to win him in beauty contests or get him laid. The scars covered nearly the entire half of his face. They weren't as bad as death, but in Turian society they were damn close. 

He glanced at his armor and realized how bad it must have been. He looked at the cracks and breaks where the impact had happened. Luckily, the armor did absorb most of it or he would be one very dead turian. He put it back on because he didn't exactly have time to grab anything from Omega before they left. He thanked the doctor and asked her where Shepard might be. 

"EDI? Where is Commander Shepard?" Chakwas asked into the air. 

Garrus cringed. An AI. That made him uncomfortable to say the least. The only time he had been around an AI like this was growing up. His mother had a small device that operated like an AI. It would search for things like alternatives to using an ingredient that she had run out of or checking her messages. Didn't like the creepy thing then either.

"Commander Shepard is in the conference room, Doctor." The disembodied voice replied back. 

Garrus nodded and headed to the upper deck. He walked in just in time to see Jacob talking to Jane. 

Garrus entered the room and put on his best brave front, which frankly hurt his face. "Shepard?"

Jacob laughed a bit. "Tough son of a bitch. Didn't think you'd be up yet."

Jane turned to Garrus and smiled. Jacob looked between the two of them wondering exactly how friendly the two of them had been. He shook it off as Garrus spoke.

"No one would give me a mirror. How bad is it?" Knowing it was a lie, but trying to make himself feel better and make Jane smile. If truth be known it was also a test to see if the Jane he knew was still in there.

She crossed her arms and leaned back on the console. "Hell Garrus you were always ugly. Slap some face paint on there and no one will even notice."

That was his Jane. It was her. No one could replicate that sarcastic humor of hers. He laughed and winced. 

"Ahh, don't make me laugh. My face is barely holding together as it is. Some women find facial scars attractive. Mind you. Most of those women are krogan."

Jane let her guard down and laughed at the statement. Jacob saluted Jane and left, feeling awkward being there for this meet up.

As the door closed behind Jacob, Garrus eyed the exit then turned back to Shepard.

"Cerberus? Frankly I'm worried. What's going on?"

Jane leaned back a bit more. "Just using them for their resources. We aren't with them. But, Garrus. I need someone I can trust. Yeah, I can trust Joker, but he can't be with me on missions. I need someone that can be my right hand in this. Be there with me through it. Walk through hell."

Garrus nodded at her. She didn't have to go into a speech. He was already signed up. He would follow her through fire if he had to. His best friend was back, he was off that shit hole Omega, and life was looking better again. "I'm fit for duty whenever you need me. I'll settle in and head down to the battery."

Shepard smiled and walked to him. Reaching out she touched his arm. "Thank you Garrus."

Garrus smiled at her, it was the first time she had ever really touched him and frankly it made him nervous as hell but in a good way. He nodded. "Anytime. Just make sure my bank account shows it."

He left the room as she laughed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this may seem a bit slow going, but I am trying to keep with the full game experience and give the romance what it deserves. I hope you guys are liking it as much as you did Fire on the Horizon. Thank you!


	6. Settling In

Garrus was settled in decently enough. As decently as he could be without half his gear and none of his personal items. He was just getting into the data on the weaponry when he heard the battery doors open behind him. He smiled and took in a deep breath of clean deodorant soap and ocean scented shampoo.

"Shepard. Need me for something?" He didn't take his eyes off the console as he waited for a response. She put an arm around his front and sat down a shot glass. He smirked and turned to her, eyeing her from the side.

"Commander. I'm shocked at you. A new ship command, new uniforms, new crew, and you already want your first in command to get drunk with you? What kind of example does that set for the crew?" He continued to click on the console in front of him, working around the glass expertly.

"Garrus Vakarian!" Shepard put her hand over her chest in fake shock and dismay.

"I am not asking you to get drunk with me. I am asking you to get comfortably numb and spend some time catching up. Catching me up, specifically." She stood looking at him like a kid that just wanted to play ball with their dad. 

He rolled eyes and grabbed the shot glass, turning to the battery door. "Which way…"

Jane smiled and jumped up. Just like the old days. Nothing had changed with her. "Out the door, down past the mess and to the right."

A few minutes later they found themselves sitting across from each other in the lounge, drinking, and laughing. 

Garrus was laughing while pouring more of the alcohol for himself and Jane. "So, there I am. Standing in the doorway of my room in the hideout. A very angry asari stripper in front of me and down the hallway, her very angry batarian boyfriend that had no idea we had hooked up. And, did I mention the two most important things of this story?"

Shepard was laughing too hard at this point to say much. She opted to just shake her head no.

Garrus held up one finger. "One, I had no idea they were even dating. None, no clue. The batarian barely spoke to me at all, much less talked about his private life."

He took a sip of his drink and sat back. Shepard smiled. "And the second thing?"

He laughed and held up two fingers. "The second thing? He was my bomb expert."

That got a huge laugh out of her. Garrus smiled as he watched her laugh. God he loved that noise. He forgot how much he had missed it. He loved making her laugh. On a friendship level of course, but also on a deeper level now. It was almost as if having her back changed things for him. He shook it off and laughed with her a bit as he tried to figure out how to make her smile again. 

He shook it all off. She was far out of his league, nowhere near his species, and he wasn't about to mess up the only real friendship he still had left in the galaxy. 

Jane smiled and sat back, drinking a bit more. "So, have you looked at the upcoming missions?"

He shook his head. "No, no time really. I don't even have time, or a clue as to how to go about, getting my stuff from the hideout. I mean, if it is even there. Much less time to look at dossiers and missions. Why? Something I should know? Do we have to pick up an angry asari stripper?"

Jane bark laughed at that one. "No, nothing like that. We have to go back to Omega. I have to pick up a doctor there. Mordin Solus. If you want to go, which you don't have to at all, we could try and get into the hideout to get your stuff before looters get it."

Garrus nodded. "I'll go. I could help a bit. I know the backways around Omega. I also know who could help and who wouldn't. Mordin seems a good enough sort. I never met him personally, but his work has been good for that area. He works in the slums, noble sure, but he means it. He isn't doing it for the fame of it. I'd also like to stop and get my stuff. If you don't mind, could we do that first? Could you and one other go with us? I'd rather have some eyes on me while I try to get stuff out of there."

Jane nodded. "Of course. Whatever you need. We get your stuff, go get the doctor, and get the hell off Omega. Hopefully for good. "

Garrus smiled at her. "Thank you Jane. You know, I missed you. I'm glad you are here, however it happened."

"So, you believe I'm me? Not some Cerberus clone?" She actually looked worried.

Garrus leaned forward and folded his hands with his elbows on his knees. "Look, I don't know how they did it Jane. I will say this. I have already tested you several times to see if you were the real Jane Shepard. I looked for responses only she would give, secrete inside jokes only she would get, and mannerisms only she would have. You exceeded each one. Now, that is either a lot of solid work on their part OR, you're really my Jane."

He let that stand on its own as he got up to put the shot glasses in the small lounge sink. Jane smiled. 

"Fair enough. I'm glad you are on board Garrus. See you in the morning?" she asked as she moved a bottle over to the sink as well.

He nodded and patted her arm as he walked by her on his way to the battery. "Definitely. Have a good one. "

She smiled and headed for her cabin. It took her about an hour to realize he had said 'my' Jane. After that realization hit, she ended up staying awake the majority of the night figuring out what he had meant….exactly.


	7. Of Doctors and Foreign Languages

Shepard decided the best ones to take to get the doctor would be Garrus and Zaeed. Both knew their way around the gangs and around Omega. Two aspects Shepard was lacking. They were also good in a fire fight and she was fairly sure that's where this was going. They left the docking bay and headed into the main drag of Omega. EDI informed them that Archangel was believed to be dead.

"Works for me." Garrus said as he checked the area for anything out of the ordinary. 

Shepard followed Garrus and Zaeed kept a close to them keeping an eye on their six. As they walked through the back corridors Shepard moved closer to Garrus so she could talk without being overheard by a large group.

"So, you know where this clinic is?" 

Garrus smiled a bit enjoying having her back at his side. She was one of the only friends he had left. Funny, his two closest friends were a human and a krogan. He was a terrible Turian. He touched her back with his hand to guide her down a particularly narrow corridor. 

"Yeah, we have a few more passages to go through, then down into the slum areas. We had to use the clinic a few times for some close calls. It's not great. It's closed mouthed, doesn't report what it sees, and if you make a sizeable donation they will provide you with as much as you need including discretion." He guided her into another hallway and past some homeless children in a corner.

She looked over and back at Garrus. Garrus sighed and nodded at Zaeed. The two men stepped over, had a hushed conversation, and Garrus did something she never expected. He walked over to the kids and knelt down. His entire facial expression changed. It softened, his eyes grew incredibly kind, and he smiled the softest smile she had seen. One of the children, one of the older teenagers, stepped forward and nodded. Garrus held out his hand and gave them a credit chit. He stood up, patted the boy on the head, and walked back with Zaeed to Shepard.

He smiled at her. "The credit chit is good at a friends store. They will get food and the friend will move them into safer surroundings, get the older one a job, all of that. It isn't on the up and up, but it is safe. Come on, let's go. The apartments are just up the way and we have to go through them to get to the clinic."

It didn't take them long to get to the clinic, find the doctor, and help him with his issue. Garrus took the chance and worked his way through the plague ridden corridors to the clinic and luckily Mordin gave him the cure. The same cure they sent through the air vents. When they finally got the cure dispersed, they were able to recruit Mordin to help them with the Collectors.

As they made their way back to the Normandy, Zaeed broke off from Garrus and Shepard. He had some business to take care of before he got back to the ship. Jane decided to take the opportunity to stop at a few shops herself. Besides, they still had to go back to the hideout and get anything they could that Garrus left behind and the shops were on the way. 

As they made their way through the shops, Garrus pointed out a few places. A good place for noodles. A decent liquor store that had items from all over the galaxy. A clothing store that carried imported leather boots for all races. There was a small diner in a dark corner on the way to the hideout. Garrus guided Jane to the stall and ordered for them. 

"It's all in turian. I can't read it." Jane said as she looked over the writing. There were no pictures to go by either.

"They serve food for all races. Here, let me order." 

Jane smiled. "You know I've never heard you speak your own language. The communicators just translate everything so I only hear what you sound like to me."

Garrus did the turian equivalent of raising an eyebrow. He smiled and leaned into her. His hand reached out and took her arm in his hand. Clicking on her omnitool he made a few adjustments and smiled. He let her arm go and looked at her for a moment. For a brief moment he took in how beautiful she actually was, for a human. He didn't really have much to compare her to, since he had only dated turian or asari females, but he still found her beautiful in her own way. 

He opened his mouth and spoke. "You are as beautiful as the morning light over the waters of Palaven."

She quirked her head and blinked for a moment. "I don't understand you."

Garrus understood her perfectly. He chuckled. "I know."

Turning he caught the attention of the turian behind the counter. He ordered two full meals, drinks, and everything was to go. Shepard took in every sound, every click, every subharmonic, and every what she hoped were words. His voice actually seemed deeper, but he had this tone to his voice that made him sound more sauve, more relaxed, and more laid back. It didn't take long for the food to be delivered in a large bag. Garrus swiped his credit chit and turned back to Jane. He pointed at her omnitool and she made the changes to turn the language translator back on. 

"So, what did you say to me before you ordered?" She moved with him through the alleys and saw the turn to underground areas that lead to the hideout he was held up in. He pulled her with him to the side and there was another doorway she had not seen before. The door opened and lead to a straight shot into the hideout. Just a long tunnel with lights that came on and went off as they passed them. 

"Oh, I just asked you if you wanted ketchup or mustard with your fries." He smirked and lead her through the door into the hideout.

She smiled. "But, you didn't order fries did you?"

He just laughed and locked the door behind them.


	8. Rekindling Friendships

Garrus stepped into the room first. The door looked like a supply closet would be hidden behind it. Jane blinked for a moment when Garrus took her hand and lead her into a small hallway. He flipped on the lights and Jane audibly gasped in surprise. 

"Garrus!?! This is beautiful." She began to walk around as he sat the food down on a table and smiled softly at her. 

"I'm a vigilante, true. That doesn't mean I have to live like a vagabond. We sort of lucked out really. One of the people we did a job for owned this building and the warehouses surrounding it. He had to get off Omega quickly after our job was finished. He didn't want to leave the buildings abandoned or put them up for sale. Letting us maintain them in exchange for the use of the main building and rooms was a better deal for everyone." 

He moved around and Jane noticed that the room must have been a bedroom for a corporate mogul. A getaway room for when business ran late. She began to look around. The room was a small apartment with an open floor plan. To the side of the hallway was a rather nice size bathroom with a full shower, sunken tub, and teakwood finish. It reminded her of the Japanese day spas back on Earth. 

Her eyes traveled down the hallway. Down the hall and on the left was an archway that lead into the kitchen area. The kitchen was open to the living room with barstools on one side of the bar and the cooktop on the other. The living room, which was straight off the hallway was simple, but nice. It had a touch of sauve to it, just like Garrus. There was a leather sectional, throw rug, mahogany wood coffee table, flat screen television, and fireplace. The television and fireplace was in the center of the room as a midway partition. On the other side was the bedroom. A large king size bed sat with the headboard flush against the wall. The bed was covered in a beautiful red silk bedding. 

She turned to Garrus who was licking some of the food sauce off his thumb as he plated everything for them. 

"Garrus, this is amazing. It's gorgeous." She was so astonished that she didn't know what else to say. 

He didn't say a word as he lifted the two plates and carried them into the living room. Setting them down on the coffee table, he took a remote and flicked a switch. What Jane had assumed was a wall opened up to reveal an amazing view of Omega. He smirked as she stood up and walked to the window to look out. She turned her head and noticed something. Her fingers tapping lightly on the glass.

"Is this…"

He nodded and swallowed some of this food. "Auto darkening and tinted filament with security paneling and explosive capabilities. I wish I could say it was my idea, but it was in place when we got the place."

She turned around and suddenly felt a bit out of place. She sat down on the sectional so she could eat and talk to him easily. Garrus had his back leaned against the corner of the sectional and was relaxed as he ate. 

Jane took a few bites of the food and smiled at him. "This is amazing. How did you know I liked orange chicken?"

He took a sip of his drink and shrugged. "When we were hunting for Saren we stopped on the Citadel for those few days. You and I had lunch at a diner and you ordered it. You said it was your favorite."

"You remembered that?" She smiled as she leaned over to get her drink.

He nodded. "Absolutely. It stuck out to me because there is a similar dish in turian culture. In fact, I'm eating it now." He pointed down at his food and took another bite. 

They ate quietly for a bit and Garrus finally spoke. "Ask me Shepard. Just...just ask."

She took a deep breath. "You've avoided me a bit. Why?"

He quirked at her question. "Hmm. I didn't realize I had been doing that. I'm sorry. It's not at all what I meant to do. I was giving you space. It seemed like you needed it."

She shook her head. "Garrus, when were searching for Saren I thought we had become close. We had laughed together, drank together, watched movies together, hell Garrus you got me on a dance floor once or twice. I tried contacting you when you went into Spectre training. You never responded. Then, I get killed. I come back from the dead and find you, but you are barely talking to me. If you don't want to be around me, part of this mission…."

Garrus held his hand up to stop her. He moved his food and scooted closer to her on the sectional. He took in a deep breath, let it out, and started. 

"First off, I want to be here. I want to help with the mission, yes, but I want to be here with you. In whatever way you need or want me to be here. So, let's get that straight. Secondly, I didn't know you tried to contact me. I was kept in a secure area and we were not allowed communication for the first part of spectre training. You died, I left, and I did that before the secure portion was over. Also, if I had received anything I would not have known how to respond."

Jane was listening and keeping eye contact. She nodded through most of what he was saying. When he said that last comment she did a hard blink.

"What do you mean? We were close. We were friends. You just respond?!?" She was utterly confused. Here she was with the one true friend, other than Joker, that she felt like she had left and he was feeding her comments that sounded like he wasn't her friend anymore at all.

"In my culture, when a man or woman are with another person, we don't have private conversations. We talk, yes. But, we don't have private conversations that the other party may not know about. It's considered to be intruding on a relationship. I respect you too much for that."

He sighed and leaned over for his drink.

"Garrus. Okay, Kaidan and I were a couple. We were engaged before I died, but frankly. Well, frankly I felt like we were going through the motions of what people expected of us. I was lonely. If truth be known i was lonelier than I had ever been in a relationship. I missed you. I wanted to talk to you. I wanted to laugh again."

She sighed and shook her head. She felt like such an ass for admitting that. It made it sounded like it had been Kaidan's fault. It was both of their faults. He wasn't ready for that commitment, but thought it was the expected step for him to take. She had enough experience to know it wasn't working and stayed anyway. 

Garrus nodded. "Point taken. I wish i had known and I'm sorry I wasn't there when you needed me. I'm here now. I'm onboard with this Shepard. You walk into hell, I walk in behind you. Simple as that."

Jane nodded and smiled for a moment. "Thank you Garrus, but do me a favor. Stop calling me Shepard when it's just us. You know my name, use it."

He chuckled a bit at that. "Fine, Jane. There I used it. Are you happy?"

She nodded. "Yes. So, now what? Gather your stuff and back to the Normandy?"

Garrus turned and looked at the clock that sat on the mantle near the flat screen. His eyes widened and he sighed. "Shit."

Jane looked at the clock and back at Garrus. "It's 11 pm. What's the problem? Your glass slipper not fit in a few minutes?"

He shook his head and shook off the reference he clearly didn't get. "No, it's just that this time of night on Omega is awful. I mean it's bad all the time. But, this time of night is really bad. If we left now we would have to literally fight our way out and past mercs that are looting, looking for a fight, and know damn good and well what I look like."

Jane shrugged. "So, what's the plan?"

Garrus sighed and looked around the apartment. "I'll get my stuff together that I want to take with me. We stay here until morning and head back to the Normandy. I'll patch into Zaeed so he doesn't show back up without us to keep any rumors or anything down. Mordin isn't set to go to the Normandy until morning anyway. How does that sound?"

Jane nodded. "Sounds fine with me, but are you sure you can trust me in your bed?"

If Garrus could have blushed it would have happened then. Instead he coughed a little.

"Garrus don't worry. I was just picking on you. Make the arrangements, just point me back to the bathroom. Seriously though we are sharing that bed. Spirits know is big enough so that we never have to touch."

She stood up and walked to the bathroom. As Garrus watched her walk away and shut the door, he took in a deep breath. The door shut and he began to ask himself what the hell he was doing. Here he was, in the old hideout, with Shepard. She was staying the night, in his bed, and they were back to normal as friends. It was like a dream come true. The only problem was she had no idea how he felt about her and he had no idea if she would feel the same way. 

He resigned himself to the fact that if he ever did want her to know how he felt about her they would have to work up to it anyway and go slow. They might as well start with this particular level of trust. Two friends, sharing a large bed, hiding out from mercs. Totally normal. He would be totally fine. They could talk more, get to know each other a bit more. Hell, maybe his crush on her was just that and would go away after tonight leaving just a solid friendship.

As he continued to wax philosophical on the matter he heard the door open. He looked up and there stood Jane. She was in her uniform pants, but had taken off her blouse. She was standing in her Cerberus pants, no boots, socks, a tank top, and her hair was down loose past her shoulders. 

He was so screwed.


	9. Comfort in Friendship

It didn't take long for Garrus and Shepard to move to the bedroom area of the apartment. Garrus moved to the closet and pulled out some sleep pants. In the same moment he tossed out a few of the clothes he wanted to take with him and sat them in a chair near the bed. He looked over at Shepard and shook his head. He left the room for a moment and came back with a small stack of clothing and toiletries. 

"Here. One of my team was a human female. She handled communications. Anyway, she looked to be about your size. Before you say no, she was the kind of person that would want you to wear them and be comfortable. You can take a shower if you like."

He moved over to a dresser and began empting the clothing and other items. Shepard noticed that most of what he was taking were items rather than clothing. She noticed a toiletries bag with full sized bottles of what she assumed to be turian soaps. There was a full size bottle of a bath oil of some kind. She knew that turians used it when their skin got dry to help reduce chafing and pain.

She perked up when she saw him grab two picture frames. One of them had a picture of two older turians. A couple that she assumed to be his father and mother. The other was of an attractive turian female in a nursing uniform.

"Is that your girlfriend?" She didn't ask to be jealous or sound odd. They were friends and she honestly was curious. Garrus had never spoken much about his personal life, so she figured she might as well take the chance to ask now. She didn't expect the response she received. 

Garrus began to laugh hysterically then suddenly stopped and answered. "No. That is not my girlfriend. I am very single for the record. That female is my sister, Solana."

He packed away the picture and began to zip up the bag he was using. 

'That's a beautiful name." Shepard was a bit surprised. She had no idea Garrus had a sister or any living family really. The only person he had mentioned was his father.

"Thanks. I'll let mom and dad know you approve." He chuckled after the comment and sat the bag down in the corner of the room.

"So, are you going to take a bath or what?" He smiled at her and she felt like the tension that had been there earlier was gone. It had been a long day. They completed their mission and did it with little to no injuries. Something that was a bit of a shocker for them. 

Jane decided to take him up on the shower and she headed down the hallway. She emerged about twenty minutes later in a pair of cotton pajamas.

"Thank you Garrus. I feel so much better. It's been a long few days." She climbed into the bed with him as if it was the most natural thing in the world to do. He should have noticed, but he didn't. He was also taking it in as something natural. Just going with the flow of the moment. He had already changed clothes for the night and was wearing sleep pants and a very loose shirt that was similar to a human t-shirt. He leaned back on some pillows and stretched out. Grabbing a remote, he clicked a few buttons and the screen flipped around to them. He surfed the channels and landed on a vid. It appeared to be a horror movie.

He tossed the remote down between them and leaned back with an arm draped over his waist and the other behind his head. Jane glanced at him and smiled to herself. She had never had a fetish for turians. She wasn't shy about dating different species. She even had a krogan boyfriend back in the day. In that moment she glanced over at her friend. She took him in for a second. 

His arms were well defined and his chest wasn't that bad either. She started to really notice him as not just Garrus, but as a man. It seemed odd for her to think about him like that. Sure she had a slight crush on him, but come on who didn't. In this moment though, she got to see him in a way that she couldn't on the Normandy. Relaxed, laid back, and not conscious of how he appeared. She was certain that if he knew she was having any thought about him beyond friendship he would change his mannerisms. So, she kept it to herself. 

She settled in and turned her attention to the tv. Before she knew it they were making comments about the movie, laughing at the silly death scenes, and wincing at others. The movie went off and the next one started up.

"Garrus?" She said his name as she moved down in the bed and began to drift off.

"Hmm?" He replied as he laid down and faced her. 

"Thank you for this. For all of this. For being my friend. For standing by me. For, this tonight. Just….just thank you." He eyes started to close. 

Garrus smiled. Her thanks meant the world to him. For the last two years everything he touched seemed to turn to shit. He didn't feel like, at least in the last few months, that he could do anything right or good. He just wanted one thing to work out. Just one thing to be good in his life. At this moment he had that. He had made his friend feel good. He had made her feel cared about. He had done something good. 

He smiled at her softly and watched her fall asleep. "You're welcome Jane."

He said it softly and as she drifted off, he reached over and moved a strand of her hair out of the way. The fact that she was comfortable enough to fall asleep in a strange place with him next to her wasn't lost on him either. He shook his head and laid down. They were just friends. Just friends. He had to keep telling himself that as he fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this is going a bit slow, but there is a lot to cover and a lot of small "missing scenes" in this romance. Thanks for sticking with me and I hope you are enjoying the ride.


	10. Horizons of the past

It had been a few days since Omega. They had been given a few assignments from the Illusive Man. Mainly picking up people on the dossier list. So far they had picked up a half dressed convict, a thief, and they were on their way to a krogan when they received word they were being diverted. The change of plans had them going to Horizon. The entire trip had been awful from jump. They arrived to find the Collector's had already arrived. On top of that, the people they did find were in status. Garrus was doing the best he could to keep calm through this. It was not going well. 

Now, there they stood in front of Alenko. Garrus looked over at Miranda. She wasn't saying much of anything. What was there to say really? On the one hand he could understand Alenko being hurt. Anyone could. On the other hand, he had no idea why he was taking this over the top route with it. Garrus thought about it for a moment. His father had always told him to put himself in someone else's shoes. So, he tried. Nope. Still a no go. If it had been him, he would have done what he wished he would have done on Omega when he first saw her. If he had been engaged to her, had a life with her, and had lost her he would have never let her go if she stood in front of him now. He wouldn't care who she was teamed up with. 

Garrus probably should have felt awkward or out of place. He didn't. He felt angry. He felt defensive for her. He felt protective, possessive, and most of all he felt bad for her. It was bad enough to go through a bad breakup or an awkward moment with an ex. It was even worse to have it happen in front of a friend. But she was having this very private moment in front of him and in front of Miranda. 

They left shortly after and boarded a shuttle back to the Normandy. Jane didn't say much on the shuttle back. She answered the necessary questions, debriefed them, and that was it. Garrus noticed she didn't look sad. Not that he expected her to cry a river in front of them. He just expected something. They left the shuttle and Jane disappeared into the elevator. Garrus was pretty certain she had gone to her quarters.

Garrus decided to leave her alone for a bit and head up to the cockpit. He made his way up there and threw himself down into the chair near Joker. Joker turned to him and raised an eyebrow. 

"Where's Shepard? Lovers spat already? Oh come on, don't give me that look big guy. It was a joke." Joker was halfway joking. Yes, it was a joke. At the same time he was a little concerned that the two closest friends he had had derailed their relationship before it even started. 

Garrus sighed. "Cabin, yes, Alenko."

It took a minute for Joker to take that in. He blinked. "Shit. Alenko was there. How bad was it?"

Garrus shook his head. "From my viewpoint or hers? From mind it was brutal. It was a jump to her betraying him. He acted as if she had deliberately not contacted him. It was almost as if the fact she was dead or whatever she was didn't matter. It wasn't the way that I would think he would have reacted. Not at all. As a soldier, it was humiliating. It was done publicly in front of myself and Miranda. From her viewpoint? Joker, I don't know. She was quiet about it. He walked off. She wished him well. She contacted for the shuttle. That was it. She went straight to the cabin."

Joker made a low whistle. "Damn. That's the last thing she needed. Garrus she hasn't been handling this well as it is. Sure she won't say anything, but that doesn't mean she isn't going through it."

Garrus nodded. "I can't imagine how it must be for her. We had time to grieve. She checked out unable to breath and checked in on a slab two years later as a rebuilt model."

Joker nodded and started putting in coordinates to his console. Garrus glanced over.

"Where are we headed?"

Joker nodded to the console. "Illusive Man has us tapped for a trip to the Ilium. We have to refuel, pick up two more on the dossier, well it's going to be a few days. Why?"

Garrus nodded. "Swing by the Citadel would you. It's what, two hours away?"

Joker nodded. "Yeah, a mass relay jump and we are there."

Garrus turned his back as he started to leave. "Joker, let's do about a two hour stop there. Let me know when we get there. Don't alert Shepard. Just make this something between us and engineering. It's a quick stop. I need to disembark, get something, and come back then we can head to Ilium. Deal?"

Joker laughed and recomputered the coordinates. "Get me a bottle of Thessia Red and a copy of Fornex and you got it. "

Garrus nodded. "Yeah, yeah."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since I had Kaiden in Fire on the Horizon, he had to be in this one. Horizon is a touchy thing for a lot of people. I want all the readers to know now, I didn't hate on him in Fire on the Horizon and I'm not going to do it here. In my view it was a relationship that would never had lasted anyway and that isn't a bad thing. Hope you guys like the next chapter.


	11. Pizza, Sparks, and Games

Joker informed Garrus as soon they reached the Citadel. He had about an hour and a half of docking time to do whatever it was he needed to handle. Garrus took the chance and visited three stops. He was back on the Normandy and ready to head out within an hour. He came through the airlock at the cockpit and Joker turned around. A smile crept on his face. 

"What the hell Vakarian?" Joker was smiling as he looked at the turian standing in front of him. He was holding two of everything. Two pizzas, two different drinks, two desserts, everything. He even had a box that looked like a gift. 

Garrus smiled. "She isn't going to talk about it and frankly I don't want her to unless she wants to. That being said, I don't want her to be alone tonight either. Normally, I'd be concerned about the crew seeing me go in there. Not for me. She's the commander. She might be our friend, but she's still the ship commander. Her reputation. Not mine. Anyway, I don't want her alone. So, I'll be there if anyone needs me."

Joker smiled and turned around in his chair only to call over his shoulder. "Hey Garrus."

Garrus turned slightly. "Yeah?"

Joker turned around and sighed. "I think it's nice you think about her reputation, but can I say something? As far as the crew goes, seeing a man that cares about her and wants her safe means a fuck of a lot more than her reputation. No one cares what's going on between the sheets. They care that she is happy and that a good decent man who actually cares is with her. You aren't bad for her reputation. You're her guardian angel and we all know it. Now get out of here. I'll deny this ever happened."

Garrus chuckled and headed through the CIC to the elevator. There were a few people in there but not many. So few actually, hardly anyone noticed him or that he was in civilian clothes. He totally missed the smiled he got as he walked through. 

He made it to her cabin and tapped on the door. He heard a muffled "come in" and stepped through. Shepard was sitting on her bed. She had a pair of sleep pants on with a loose shirt. Her hair was down and the curls were softly flowing over her shoulders. She had some datapads around her and was focusing on them. He noticed a glass of wine on her bedside table. The lights were mostly out except for the glow from the fish tank. 

He stepped in and decided to just jump into the moment with both feet. 

"I have one human pizza and one turian pizza. I also grabbed some beers, one of each type. I have the passcode for the biotiball game tonight, Maestros are playing, and…."

He trailed off and sat down a box in front of her. It was a baby blue color and had a satan ribbon over it. She raised an eyebrow and pulled on the ribbon. The box opened and she let out a laugh. A genuine laugh that made him warm all over. 

"Donuts. There are even three in there for me. So scoot over."

Garrus sat everything down and began moving the datapads. He was stacking them up as she watched. He was so comfortable around her it almost scared her. He stacked up the last datapads. He walked over and got the passcode for the game ready. When it was set up he went back to the bed and stared at her. 

"I said scoot." He said it sternly enough to make her smile. She scooted over and threw herself back on the pillows. He tossed his boots off and moved all the food out where she could reach it. He sat beside her and put his pizza on his lap and the beer on the bedside table. 

The game started and the words, "Biotiball Maestros versus Hackers" came up on the screen. He smiled and leaned back. 

They watched part of the game when Shepard spoke up softly. "I'm not upset for the reasons you think."

Garrus turned his head slightly and reached for the remote. He turned the volume down and let her continue. 

"Was it unexpected? Yeah, it was. I know I should be upset that my former fiance said those things to me. I should be upset that he felt that way. I should be upset for a lot of reasons. I'm not. Kaidan as always been and will always be a by the book Alliance soldier. That's fine. You know what you get with him. I'm upset at myself."

Garrus interrupted her. "Yourself? For what?!?"

He sat up and took a swallow of beer. How in the world could she be upset at herself and why?

Jane took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "I'm mad at myself for thinking he would react like he was in love with me and missed me. Just, let me finish. I am mad because I know he never was in love with me and I am not stupid. I should not expect him to act like something he never was. I am also mad at myself for not being upset about the things I should be upset about. It was awkward and it hurt, but it hurt for reasons I can't explain."

Garrus nodded. He wasn't sure what to say to her. Not really. So, he went with the first thing that came to mind.

"The night before Ilos, I hated myself. I should have hated myself for leaving C-Sec. I should have hated myself for not being a very good turian. I should have hated myself for a lot of different reasons. I hate myself because of jealousy."

He took another slice of pizza out and got started on it. Shepard looked at him. 

"Jealous of what?"

He chuckled a bit. "Not of what. Of who."

She looked puzzled at Garrus for a minute and he cleared his throat. He took another pull off the beer and looked at the game, making sure to keep his eyes off her.

"Alenko. I saw him, well everyone did really, head to your cabin that night. I was jealous and angry at myself. Jealous because he was the one that got to add a few sparks to your sky that night. Mad at myself because, well, I was to much of a coward to say anything, so I got to sit on the sidelines. I would have loved the chance to give those sparks. Instead I was just jealous of what he had."

He let that sink in as he drank his beer and watched the game. 

Shepard didn't know what to say. She let it sink in for a bit and cleared her throat. "Sparks are like a fireworks show Garrus. You always think that the first time you see them they are incredible. Then you see a show with someone that knows how to spark your soul and not just your eyes. That show is the one that turns into a fire and engulfs you. That's the show you keep going back for every time and compare every other show to. Alenko, well there was nothing to be jealous of. He was just my frist show."

Garrus turned to her and smiled softly. Reaching his hand out he let a talon run through her curls. One talon caught a curl and untangled it from another, letting it unravel and fall softly around his hand. 

"Well, I know I see something incredible. Something the engulfs me."

As he spoke his head moved closer to her and she felt herself moving close to him. She closed her eyes and could feel the heat off his breath. She could almost feel….

"Commander. We have an emergency signal coming in from the migrant fleet. Do you want it in your cabin?"

She opened her eyes and was less than an inch from Garrus. He smiled, didn't say a word, and simply touched his forehead to hers. He pulled back after the brief touch. Grabbing his beer and moving it to her, he motioned to see if she wanted another. She smiled and nodded.

"Yeah, Joker send it through. How are are we from their location?"

Joker came back a second later. "ETA 12 hours. It's not the fleet we need to go to. It's Haestorm."

Shepard stood up, went to her desk, and took the call. Afterwards, she went back to bed where Garrus was sitting.

They finished the game, fell asleep, and by the middle of the night were sleeping peacefully with Garrus' arm draped Shepards waist. Neither of them having mentioned what happened before the distress call, but both knowing everything had changed.


	12. Morning Before the Storm

Jane woke up early during the Normandy day cycle. The first thing her eyes fell on where empty pizza boxes and a few beer bottles. She glanced behind her to find the bed empty and the blanket neatly drawn up on that side. She sat up wiping her eyes and jumped slightly when she saw Garrus asleep on the sofa. He must have moved sometime during the night. Shepard got up and moved slowly past him. She took a second to realize how peaceful he looked. It was strange how he could look so uncomfortable body wise, but yet so at peace. 

She made her way to the bathroom and turned the hot water on. She knew, based on what Joker had said, that she had at least a few more hours before they would reach Haestorm. She stepped into the shower and closed her eyes as the warm water fell down her head, to her neck, and down her back. It wasn't long before the events of the past few weeks and months started to roll into the front of her mind. She hadn't really thought about it that much. Okay, that was a lie. She had tried not to think about it that much. If she thought about it, it made her go mad.

She had talked to Dr. Chakwas a few times, but she knew the real answers were with one person, Miranda. She needed to know the how, the why, all of it. She needed to make sense of it all somehow and cope with it. At that moment she was thankful for people like Joker and Garrus. The ones that didn't seem to care what had happened, but more the fact that she was with them again. Not as a pawn in some galaxy wide chess game. As the friend that they had loved and missed and in some respects needed.

She turned and turned the water off. As she moved out to grab the towel she let her glance fall outside the bathroom. Garrus was still asleep on the sofa. She could see his foot peaking off the edge. She shook her head and smiled. It was amazing to her that Garrus wasn't taken in these last two years.

Sure, he had stories of quickies and one night flings, but nothing serious. She knew he had dated before he joined up with her against Saren. He had mentioned one or two names here and there. She didn't know much really. She never wanted to really ask or pry. She did wonder how someone like him, who seemed like an excellent catch for a turian, was single. Maybe what was a catch in human culture wasn't a catch in turian culture. She shrugged off the thought and walked out of the bathroom. 

Garrus began to sit up when she came into the step down sleeping area of the cabin. 

"Hey sleepy head." She said smiling as she toweled off her hair.

He nodded and smiled as he stretched his arms. "Hi, yourself. Sleep well?"

She nodded, not mentioning that she knew they had fallen asleep in the same bed. Then again neither did he. They kept up some small talk as he stood up, went to the bathroom, came out, and began helping her clean up the mess from the night before. He tossed the last bottle into the garbage and took the garbage to the outer doorway, knowing the cleaning crew would be by to pick it up later. He stepped back in and grabbed his key card for the main battery and the small room he had there. 

Standing at the doorway, leaning on the door jam, he talked to her for a bit more. They were talking about Haestorm, what to expect, and what the plan was. Shop talk. The problem was Jane couldn't stop thinking about his voice. Had it always been a silk on stone sound? Had he always had forearms built like a gun show? And that chest. Had it always been that broad? 

"Shepard? It isn't that deep of a question. Who are we taking out with us on this one?" He chuckled a little about her dazed look. 

She stood up, shook it off, laughed a little, and answered. "Oh who cares. It's me and you. We both know whoever we bring is going to just pale in comparison to us."

He chuckled and nodded as he turned to walk out of the cabin and head to the battery. As he stood in the elevator heading to shower and change for the mission, he wondered if her hair had always been that silky and if she had always used that soap that smelled like heaven.

When the doors to her cabin closed, Shepard walked over to the datapads on her desk and looked down. She smiled as she thought about the night before and could still feel the pressure and warmth around her waist from his arm.


	13. Stern Pep Talks

The only good thing that came out of Haestorm was finding Tali. Jane had to admit she had a sigh of relief when Tali agreed to join the crew. She wished Tali could have brought Kal'Reager with her. He was a hell of a soldier from what Jane could see, but she understood why he returned to the fleet. Tali came on board and she and Jane went straight to the conference room. Jacob was waiting for the debriefing. Though Tali was not exactly welcoming to Jacob, his reaction to her was uncalled for. Tali left the room on her way to engineering and Jane slowly turned to Jacob.

"Let me be very clear with you Jacob. This ship may have been built by Cerberus, but the Illusive Man put me in command. Every single person on this ship is under my command and here at my discretion. That includes you." She was leaning on the console looking at him. 

Jacob looked at Shepard and got the cocky smile he seemed to have plastered on his face the vast majority of the time. "I'm not sure what the problem here is Shepard."

For whatever reason, at that point, Jacob hit the broadside of Jane's switch. In the Alliance his insubordination and assumptive attitude would not have been tolerated for more than two seconds. Maybe that was why he was with Cerberus, she thought.

"Jacob, the only person I have brought on this ship that you have not had some sort of an attitude toward has been Garrus. I'm fairly certain that is because you, like the rest of the galaxy, has seen his sniping skills and you like to sleep easily at night. That being said, for every other member of the crew I have brought on this ship, you have had some form of snarky out of line comment. I'm done. I'm done with the comments, condescending attitude, and above it all attitude. You might be good at what you do, but I've seen better. Though you are an asset to this time, you are not an asset to me if you continually make moves to bring yourself up by pulling others down. One more out of line attitude driven comment to members of my team will land you on the Citadel trying to hitch a ride back to wherever the hell the Illusive Man is located. Are we crystal?"

The look on his face said loud and clear that he had no idea this side of Jane Shepard existed. He had heard stories, but this was far beyond what he had heard.

"Yes, Commander." Was all he said before he saluted at her. 

"Dismissed." She responded curtly. 

He turned and left the room as quickly as possible. As he turned down the hall, he moved past Garrus who was heading to the med lab. 

Garrus glanced at Jacob and looked in the open door of the conference room. He saw Jane standing there seething with her hands on the console in a leaned over position. She felt someone watching her and looked up. Her eyes fell on Garrus and he had to smirk. He stepped into the room and the door shut behind him.

"So, I take it that wasn't the nicest of meetings?" He said in a bit of a chuckle.

Jane let out a breath she really didn't know she was holding. She moved to the wall and leaned her back against it as she crossed her arms. 

"No, I'm tired of his attitude to nearly everyone that comes on this ship. He just went at Tali! Let me repeat that. He just went at TALI. Tali who, yeah she is okay with a firearm, but she is a hacking expert. That's what she does. Hacking systems, engineering, building and repairing mechanics. That's what she does. She literally just lost her entire team save one marine that damn near threw himself onto the grenade for her. Her people are using her, again might I add. This guy, who knew that because of the report that came back before we did, decides to get his rocks off by going at her. What in the actual fuck is wrong with him Garrus?!?"

She shook her head and leaned harder against the wall behind her. Garrus began walking to her around the console. He was walking slowly and smiling. He stopped just in front of her and leaned his ass against the console. 

"I could come up with a million and five nice ways to say something, but it's us so I'm just going to say it. He is a prick. Just a prick. He has probably been told by Cerberus that he is the best thing to walk the planet. They clearly have done that with others, like Miranda. It's an okay tactic for an organization to do, but it doesn't usually pay off in the end. You end up with people like Jacob. Just overlook it. Most of us do, and frankly Jane, our family thinks he is a joke. Me, Tali, Joker, and you. We are what matters. I'm even starting to bring Kasumi into the group and maybe Jack." 

He smiled and looked at her waiting for the response. She didn't respond at all really, which worried him. He stood up straight and moved towards her.

"Hey, what's going on? This isn't the Shepard I know. Talk to me." He put his hand on her shoulder and got her to look him the eye.

She sighed and shook her head. "I hate this Garrus. I hate working for them. I hate knowing that I owe them in some way. I hate thinking they could have put something in me that with a flick of a switch could take me out. I hate all of this. I just want to be back to normal and I know that will never happen again. I can't figure out how to cope with this." She shrugged.

He nodded and moved back to the console to sit back against it again. "Jane, do you want me to be honest?"

She simply nodded at him. 

"They are a necessary evil right now. The Alliance all but fucked over and shut up everyone after you died. The only reason I was set to come out of it decently was because I was never Alliance. Kaidan came out decently because he did whatever they wanted and however they wanted it. We have a job to get done. We are soldiers. We use the resources we are given and Cerberus is a resource. Those of us that know you know three things. We know it's really you that is in front of us. We know we are walking into hell with you. We know we are with you and no one else. You cope with us because we need to cope as well. We are family, period, and it seems that family is growing. Disfunctional as we are."

He let the words sit there with her and resonate. It was part soldier pep talk and part just the truth from Garrus' viewpoint. 

She knew he was right. It didn't make it easier, but she knew he was right. She also knew it was time to go talk to Miranda about the questions she had.

She nodded and stood up striaght. "Why don't you go check on Tali? She's in engineering. I have a meeting to get to. I'll see you later Garrus."

She patted his arm and moved past him to the elevator. She just hoped Miranda would answer her.

As the door shut behind her Garrus nodded and sighed. He couldn't imagine what she was going through. He wished there were more he could do. Some way to comfort her. He wished he could just hold her, tell her it would be okay, and….no…

"Stop it Vakarian. Cold shower yourself." He said to himself and headed to engineering.


	14. Personal Truths and Cosmic Questions

Jane made her way to Miranda's quarters and waited for the bell to notify Miranda she was there. Miranda let her in with a polite smile on her face. 

"Commander, how can I help you?" She asked from behind her desk. 

"Miranda, I have some questions. I need to know some things. Some things about me, about the project, about what happened." Jane stood in front of Miranda's desk waiting for the list of why she couldn't talk about it. Instead, she was pleasantly surprised.

Miranda smiled and stood, motioning to a sitting area near a window of the quarters. "You have every right to ask and I will do my best to answer."

They sat down and Jane found herself looking out the window for a moment, trying to gather her thoughts. She finally spoke, but it was softer than she intended, uncomfortable, and so foreign sounding to herself. 

"How did you find me?" 

Miranda nodded and kept her eyes on space as it floated by the window. She leaned forward, putting her elbows on her knees.

"Cerberus came in possession of your body. I'm not sure how the Illusive Man actually found you. When you arrived to me, I was told three things. You were in a coma, you had received massive trauma to the body, and your brain was intact. I wasn't told how they, whoever the they that had you before Cerberus, had kept you alive." She decided to conclude on that note and let Shepard ask her what she needed to know.

Shepard nodded and took in what she had just been told. She took a deep breath.

"Am I still me? What I mean is…"

Miranda interrupted her. "Are you really you are when I said rebuilt you did I mean literally rebuild you and put your brain in an AI shell?"

Shepard took her eyes off the window and looked at Miranda. She wasn't sure what Miranda saw in the look on Jane's face, but by the way Miranda's features softened she knew it must not have been the stoic nature Jane was going for. 

"You are you Jane Hannah Shepard. You are still you. We rebuilt the parts of your body that no longer worked. Your back had been broken. You had some organ failure that was irreversible. You were paralyzed from the neck down. You had massive damage to your legs, even without the loss of use. We fixed all of that. So, whereas some parts of you are biotic, the spirit of you is still there. You are still you."

Miranda looked at Jane hoping that answered the question. What she heard come from Jane next was a question and statement all in one. It was also something she wasn't prepared for.

"I died Miranda. I don't remember anything. Just the inability to breathe, darkness, then your voice in that lab. I. Was. Dead." 

Miranda shook her head and stood up. She moved to the window and leaned against it as she looked at Jane.

"It's funny how we convince ourselves of things isn't it? You "came back" and heard reports of your death. You assumed that the black you saw, the absence of an afterlife or memory of one meant you had died and there is nothing after we die. You assumed that the reports were accurate. The problem is, at no time have I ever used the term dead or death when it come to you. You did. The Alliance did. The news did. Cerberus never did. I never did. That's because you didn't die. At no point in the records that were given to me did it say you had actually died. You were found floating unconscious. You were placed in a coma. No death and for the record when I got you, I did a check. There was no sign of brain death at any point either."

Jane took in what she was saying and got a confused look on her face. Miranda sighed and smiled. She took a chance and walked over to Jane, resting a hand on her shoulder.

"Commander, you weren't dead for two years. You were in a coma. You were gone, but not dead. You are still you, just perfected. You are still you, just a little harder to actually kill."

She smiled at Shepard who surprisingly looked up and smiled back.

 

Garrus had made it to engineering and stepped in to see Tali standing at one of the consoles. He walked behind her and tapped her shoulder. She jumped slightly, turned around, and before he could stop her or say anything she jumped on him in a hug. He let out the deep chuckle that made her feel like she was home. It was that comforting chuckle that made her think of a brother. She pulled back and smiled on the other side of her shielding. 

"Garrus. It's so good to see you! I wanted to say more on Haestrom, but we were a little busy." 

He nodded. "Yeah, you do seem to get yourself in the messes don't you? You want to have dinner with me and fill me in on what's been going on?"

She nodded and they headed to the mess area. Neither of them felt comfortable eating and talking openly there so they grabbed food and headed to the shuttle bay. Finding a place to sit between crates, they set up one as a makeshift table and began to eat. 

Tali began filling Garrus in on what had been happening in the fleet and what was going on with Haestorm. 

"Tali, don't take this wrong, but you're people are assholes. They use you whenever they can and it drives me crazy."

Tali nodded as Garrus took a bite of his food. "I know, but they are still my people. There are good ones. Kal'Reager is one."

Garrus smiled at her as she watched her expression change with the mere mention of the man's name. He chuckled a bit and took a sip of his drink. 

"Kal'Reager is a good man. Seems like a very capable soldier. Very protective of you. I mean, I guess that is because of the mission though. Right?" He made a pause before he said the last word. He knew what he was doing, and what he was fishing for. 

Tali cleared her throat and tried to eat more. Well, at least what passed for eating by quarian standards. 

"I don't know what you mean Vakarian." 

Garrus laughed and shook his head. He finished the last bite and tossed his napkin onto the tray in front of him. "Sure you don't Zora"

She took in a deep inhale and let it out slowly. "So, there might be other reasons, but it isn't what you think. You know what Garrus, it's personal."

Garrus nodded and smirked as he clasped his fingers behind his head and leaned back stretching a bit. "Personal? Yeah, I have one of those stories too. Wish I could share it with someone I trusted."

Tali leaned back now, folding her arms, and looking at him. "Spill it Vakarian."

"You first Zora." He put the emphasis on her last name and she let out a huff sound.

She finally sighed and began her story. "We met shortly after I returned to the fleet. He and I were assigned to some jobs the fleet needed handled. Because I had experience in certain areas of the galaxy that most of the fleet did not, I was put in charge. We spent a lot of time together.   
One took a shuttle out a few months ago. We were handling some readings for the fleet, and he was with me to make sure I was safe. It's standard. We ended up having issues with the shuttle and were separated from the fleet for three days. No, nothing happened. We just got to know each other and had a good time. We got back to the fleet, went on a date or two, and had a good time. Then we had Haestorm. That's it."

Garrus smiled. "Would you go out with him again?"

Tali thought about it for a moment. "Yes. I mean, okay truth time. We talk daily. Several times. Sometimes it is a quick message. Sometimes it is more. I don't know where it is going. I'm willing to see where it might go."

Garrus nodded. "You deserve to be happy Tali."

Tali shifted a bit and got more comfortable as she brought a leg up to her and curled it under her. "So, what's the deal with you and Jane?"

He looked surprised. "How did you know it was Jane?"

Tali laughed a soft laugh. "First of all, everyone knows. Secondly, you just told me. So, what's going on?"

Garrus got a little more comfortable and Tali noticed a slight flint of sadness cross his face. She wasn't sure if it was her imagination, but she decided to let it go for now. 

"We spent the night together." He let it out and laughed hard as Tali began to choke on her drink. 

"Sorry, sorry. Oh spirits, I'm sorry." He kept laughing. For a few minutes.

"What do you mean you spent the night together?" She took in a few deep breaths as she waited.

"We saw Alenko on Horizon. He was, well less than nice to her. I knew she was upset and didn't want to talk about it. We made a stop and I got us food and drinks. I took them to her cabin and we watched a movie. We ate. We fell asleep together. That's all. It was the night before we came to get you." He stopped and took a deep breath but she noticed that he was very passive about things, just like always.

"So, can I ask you something?" Tali asked as calmly as she could.

Garrus nodded and waved his hand for her to go ahead. "Sure."

She took a chance and went with going straight to the point. "Did you want more?"

Garrus blinked. He didn't expect that question. "I, uh...well.."

He was cut short by Joker coming over the comms. "Garrus, we need you up in the cockpit as soon as possible. There's a problem with that cannon you ordered. Like, namly, you ordered a cannon."

Garrus stood up and opened his mouth to apologize to Tali. She smiled and waved him on. "I've got this, go on. And Garrus?"

He turned quickly at the door to the shuttle bay. "Yeah?"

"If you get the chance? Don't not do something you'll regret."

He quirked his head at her and took in what she said. He softly smiled. "Thank you Tali."

The doors closed and Tali smiled to herself. "Spirits let them figure this out. They need each other."


	15. Hotels, Revenge, and Yoga Pants

It had been a few days since they picked up Tali. In that time, Shepard had been running around putting out fires for several crew members. Zaeed, Jacob, Miranda, and Jack had all had their issues. Shepard didn't mind helping. It wouldn't have mattered if she did. The deal with each one of the crew members was put in place as part of them joining the crew. She was tied into it if she wanted to be or not. 

Now she found herself walking into the Citadel with Garrus. He had tracked down Sidonis, well at least a very good lead on him. Shepard felt for Garrus with this. He had lost his whole team because of his trust in that very team and each one of the members. It just turned out that one of the team members wasn't as loyal as he thought. Now, his entire team was gone and this guy Sidonis was at the root fo that.

Shepard wasn't sure how this was going to pan out. She knew two things. Garrus was in the lead on this one and this was Garrus' battle not hers. It didn't matter how she personally felt. This was his issue, his to deal with, his to live with. As much as she wanted him to back down on, at the least, his anger, she knew it wasn't her place. So, here they walked side by side into his hell instead of hers.

They found a volus that informed them that Fade was actually Harken. That set them on their way to find Harken in the factory district. Shepard had to admit that seeing Garrus like this was a bit of a turn on. She wouldn't admit it outloud of course, but the fact was still there.

The pair made it to the factory district and battled their way through Harken's mercenaries. It took over an hour and damn near every bit of ammo they had. Garrus was tense. Shepard could understand why. She didn't like the darker side of Garrus that was coming out. It wasn't because of his attitude. She had seen that dark attitude enough in fights. It was the fact that it made her wonder what all had happened to him during those two years she was gone.

They walked into the small room that held Harkan and Shepard stepped back, letting Garrus take the full lead. Garrus walked to Harken at a deliberate pace. Shepard had seen it before. It never set fear in her, but it always set fear in the person on the receiving end of that blue eyed turian glare. Harken tried to play off not being afraid. It wasn't working.

Garrus tossed Harken against a wall and stuck his forearm into Harken's throat. He told him quickly what he wanted.

"You helped a friend of mine disappear. I need to find him."

"I'll need more than that." Harken replied.

"HIs name is Sidonis…" Garrus was cut off by Harken.

"I know who he is. I'm not telling you anything. It's bad for business."

Garrus knocked him to the ground and put his foot on the guys neck. "You know what else is bad for business? A broken neck." He pressed his foot into Harken's throat.

WIthin a few minutes Harken was up, breathing, and arranging the meeting that Garrus needed. A meeting in front of Orbital lounge.

Garrus and Shepard left and made their way to a shuttle. The meeting was for the next day, middle of the day specifically.

Garrus drove the skycar and headed to a set of clubs and a hotel or two. He pulled into a parking garage, got out without a word, and came back with a keycard. He tossed it on the dash and drove the skycar to the fifth floor docking area of the hotel. He parked and turned to Shepard. 

"I got a room. No point in going back to the Normandy. It might draw suspicion. I got a room for the night. I know it's early. We can order in some food and hang out in the room until tomorrow. I need to make some calibrations on my rifle before tomorrow. It's one bed. I hope you don't mind."

Garrus didn't wait for an answer. He grabbed a small bag out of the back of the skycar. Shepard thought to herself that he must have had the skycar all set up. She got out and took a deep breath. She said nothing as they took the passage to the room and Garrus opened the door. He walked in and tossed the bag on the floor. He went to the window and adjusted the air controls near the curtains. It was almost as if she wasn't there with him and that bothered her.

She moved over to the bed and sat down with her back to the wall. Garrus turned around and looked at her. There was a look of sympathy on his face. He sighed and looked at her. He decided to walk over the bed and sit down in front of her. It was a bold move for him, but at this moment, in this time, it was what he needed to do. He needed to feel something, anything, other than anger surging through him. 

He sat down and took her hand. "Shepard you are about the only friend I have. I need you here. I'm glad you are here. I'm sorry if it seems otherwise."

He looked down at their hands. His hands were palm up and her hands were resting softly in them. In that moment, he took in how it felt. How her skin felt against his, how soft she was, how warm. He didn't deserve it. That was his first thought. He didn't deserve her friendship after all he had let happen to his own team. He was a disgrace to her. A bad turian. 

She snapped him out of it by squeezing his hands back. "Your talons are blunted."

He shook his head like he didn't understand what she had said. He smiled a little. "Yeah, I blunt them down a bit. It's mostly for dealing with the guns in the battery. If I let them stay a traditional length, they'd get in the way a lot."

She looked up at him. "Garrus are you sure this is what you want to do?"

He smiled a bit and then pulled his straight face routine. "Yes, I'm sure. I mean I could have chosen a different hotel, but for one night it will do nicely. Besides the bed is big enough that we never have to touch. See? Planning."

She began laughing and popped him playfully. "I meant…"

He cut off her and stood up, letting her hands drop to her lap. She looked down at the empty hands and noticed it wasn't the only thing about her that felt empty when he stopped touching her.

"I know what you meant. Yes, I'm sure. Look, can we not talk about this tonight? Can we just relax and let me prep for tomorrow?"

Shepard looked up at him. "Sure."

He nodded. "Thank you Shepard. Now, I need to get some stuff lined up to work on tonight. My sniper rifle sights are not as precise as they should be. We can order food if you want to."

She nodded. "Yeah, I'd like that. I'll find something to watch while you handle the rifle issues you have. Maybe it will do me good to take a break, even for a few hours tonight."

Garrus stood and moved over to a communication station. She heard another voice come through welcoming him to a sushi restaurant there on the Citadel. She smiled to herself and turned around a bit shocked when he ordered for both of them and got her favorite sushi. At the end of the call he finished by ordering her caramel cheesecake.

She turned and he laughed. "Um, I took the liberty on something. I hope you don't mind. I knew we would need at least one night here depending on how long the search for Fade lasted. I, well, look in the bag. I hope they are the right size."

She walked over and smiled as she pulled out a pair of sleeping style yoga pants and a loose t-shirt. She looked at him beaming and didn't that beaming smile just melt his heart and make him feel amazing. 

"Garrus, I don't know what to say. Thank you for thinking of me."

She headed to the bathroom to change. He smiled as she walked off and when the door shut he whispered. "You're welcome Jane."

She stood in the bathroom and changed clothes. Looking in the mirror she saw herself in the clothes that Garrus had thought ahead enough to buy for her. No one had ever done that for her. It made her smile and feel important to someone and not just as their superior officer.

She looked in the mirror one last time and sighed. "This is going to be a long night."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm taking some liberties with this guys. I never liked that as a close as Garrus and Shepard are they rarely had alone moments or even touched before the blowing off steam comment. Shepards desire to blow off steam seemed to come out of nowhere while Garrus' response was too quick and approving for them to have had no build up. So, with that mind I will have more scenes leading up to a point that blowing off steam and a quick "sure why not" makes a bit more sense. Hope you guys like it.


	16. Relaxing Truths

Shepard stepped out of the bathroom and made her way into the rest of the hotel room. Garrus had already laid out all of his rifle parts, cleaning kit, and anything else he needed. He had taken his shirt off exposing his chest and arms. It was rare that she saw him this way. She had caught a glimpse of him like this once or twice when she showed up at the battery, but nothing on a routine basis. She noticed how relaxed he seemed to be as he moved around the work area. He even smiled at her slightly when she came in the room. 

"Food should be here soon. I think there are a few premium channels and a movie or two ready to go on the screen. Be careful though. I had a room one night, waiting on a transport out, flicked on a channel, and let's just say that what showed up was...interesting." He made that sly smile that he had when he was on the cusp of a dirty joke. 

She smiled and laughed softly back. "I'll try to be careful, although I'm not exactly pristine ya' know Garrus."

He got wide eyed for a second and started laughing as he walked to the small fridge in the room. He opened the door and grabbed a beer, closing the door back, and making his way back to the work area. 

"Remind me to play a game of, what is it, never have I ever with you." 

Shepard laughed a bit and watched a news broadcast as they waited for the food. It didn't take long for the delivery guy to bring it. Shepard got it so that Garrus remained hidden. She was concerned that if he was seen getting food, then someone might tip of Sidonis, even though the chance was slim.

They began eating as Garrus worked. It was silent, but a comfortable silence. Shepard didn't even realize how comfortable she was until she adjusted the pillows and had sat back on the bed. Her legs were stretched out under the ultra soft comforter on the bed. She had even thrown her hair up in a very messy ponytail that she would never dare were around people, much less a crewmate. 

She was just moving a piece of the cheesecake to her mouth when she caught Garrus looking at her. He was just glancing, but there was something in the way he glanced up. 

"What?" She said softly and looked around her.

"It's just nice to see you relaxed. I like when people are relaxed around me. It's rare." He said as he looked down at what he was doing on his rifle. She wasn't sure exactly what he was doing, but it had something to do with the scope.

He kept talking as she sipped her coffee, at her cheesecake, and listened. 

"Usually people, especially humans, see the big bad turian. We don't usually have the best of reputations. We were part of the genophage, so that knocks out happy relations with most Krogan. We had the war with your people, so that knocks out the vast majority of humans. The asari. Well, to be honest the asari, in larger numbers, believe they are the superior race when it comes to the galaxy. Baterians don't like anyone. Salarians are all science. So, basically yeah. Not too many people other than my own kind are comfortable, and even then it is a stretch." 

He never looked up as he talked. He kept his eyes on what he was doing. In that moment, Shepard realized she was given a glimpse into Garrus that she was certain no one else had.

"I can relate. Well, at least on some level." She took a sip of her coffee and finished the last bite of the cheesecake. She was about to speak when Garrus broke in.

"Was the cheesecake okay? The turian version is hit or miss." She blinked at the question. The tone of his voice was one of genuine curiosity. Almost like he was taking mental notes. What she didn't know what that he was taking mental notes on what she liked and didn't. He didn't acknowledge that he was, or even why, but it was happening regardless.

"It was really good. The caramel sauce was amazing. Thank you." She smiled even though he still wasn't looking at her.

He flipped the rifle over and looked down the sight. He shook his head. Something still wasn't right. At least not to his standards. He put the rifle back down and started working again.

"Cali must have been working in the kitchen today. If Evan is working don't touch or eat anything." He chuckled a bit and continued. "Little things you learn when you eat out most nights and work for C-Sec."

There was a pause and Garrus stopped to look at her. He waved his hand a bit in a continue motion. "You were saying? About relating."

She shook her head as if she was coming out of a fog. 

"Right. I just meant that I could relate to you on a certain level with people not being comfortable. It seems that I am so weird thing to be worshiped or feared. The great Commander Shepard. What was it Kaidan called me? Savior of the Citadel."

She let out an exasperated sigh and shook her head. "No one ever really relaxes around me. There is no girls night out. No night out at the bar. Most of the time everyone is on guard. Especially now. You and Joker are the only two that seem fully relaxed. Even Tali seems guarded about what she will say and won't. Like she isn't sure how I will react." 

Garrus sat back and put his arm over his knee. He nodded. "No one really sees the real you because they are too busy seeing the uniform or the skin tone or whatever else it is they see."

She nodded. "Exactly! No one sees Jane. They see the Commander. For once I would love someone to see Jane because that's what they wanted to see. That's who they wanted to know."

Garrus nodded. He wanted to say so much, but he was stopped by his own nerves and by what was going to happen the next day. His hand was moving over his rifle absently.

Jane spoke up. "I'm worried about you Garrus. What I'm seeing, isn't the you I know. I know you asked what would I do if I had been betrayed. I don't know. I would like to think that I would take the high road and not a road paved on revenge. Then I think about things. If I found out that someone I trusted betrayed me, and that lead to others dying to innocents dying, then revenge turns to avenging not revenge. It's a tough choice. I'm just worried about you after the revenge or avenge is taken out."

He nodded and took it in. Taking a deep breath a few times as if he was mulling it all over. She continued. 

"My worry is that when you go through something like that you have to live with those ghosts of the lives you took. The trick is you are already living with the ghosts of the lives you felt you should have protected. So, I'm not sure which is worse and it isn't for me to choose. It isn't for me to say how or why you do what you do in this. It is personal with very personal feelings surrounding it."

Garrus nodded and looked up at her. Their eyes met and they stared at each other for a few moments that seemed like an eternity. 

"What are you saying Jane?"

His voice was like a soft rolling thunder in the dark room. 

"I'll do whatever you need and back you on whatever you decide to do. It's not my fight, but you are my friend. You've walked through hell with me. I'll do the same." 

She took a deep breath and looked at her hands that were folded in her lap. The soft light from the news was filling the room and flickering a bit. She jumped a bit when she saw and felt his hand touch her folded ones. His other hand touched her shoulder. He was on his knees on the side of the bed. 

"Thank you, Jane. Thank you for understanding."

She nodded and smiled as he went back to his work and she went back to watching the flat screen that she so rarely had the chance to view.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! I took a vacation for a bit to recenter myself in life and in writing. Routine updates are coming as well as new stories. Hope you like them and thanks for the support!


	17. Finished Missions and Racing Thoughts

Helping Garrus went as smoothly as something like that sort of thing could go. Shepard wasn't sure exactly what would happen, or how it would pan out, until the very last minute. Her only job was to get Sidonis into the line of fire. She did just that. It was on Garrus from that point. She had meant what she told him the night before. It was his to do with as he pleased and as he needed. She couldn't make the choice for him. Not for something he would live with for the rest of his life. It had to be his choice and his alone.

In that final moment, it was his choice. When it was all over, she met up with him back at the hotel room. He was already there, packed up, and ready to go. He didn't say anything to her. He sat in a chair that was nestled beside the ample bed. The bed he didn't sleep in the night before. She had slept well, thinking he would nestle in at some point. He never did. Now, he sat in the reclining chair. One of the last bottles of Turian ale in one hand and the remote for the television in the other. 

He watched the newscasts from around the Citadel while he waited for her to finish packing up the small amount she had with her. She went to the bathroom and put her uniform back on before heading back into the room. He still said nothing. Just sat watching the news in a somber silence. He finished the beer, chucked the bottle in the trash, flipped the tv off, and stood up. Cracking his neck side to side he finally spoke.

"You ready?" Those two words were the first two he had spoken since he finished his mission. 

He didn't sound different, at least not to anyone else. Jane knew better. She didn't know how but she could hear the subharmonic change in his voice. He was resigned to what had happened, at peace with the result, but it didn't make him feel any different. She knew because she had been there, far too many times. She decided to just nod in response to his question.

They left the room and he placed his hand at her lower back as he guided her from the room and turned to close the door. They walked down the hall to the lift. Taking it to the bottom floor of the hotel and out into the lobby. She noticed his hand barely left her lower back. She stood with him at the circulation desk as he turned in the key.She noticed a very large amount of money wrapped around the key when he gave it in.

"Thank you, sir. We hope you and your companion enjoyed your stay." The asari behind the counter stated. Jane watched as she checked the card key into a box under the circulation desk and pocketed the money. 

It wasn't surprising. The Citadel was like anywhere else. If you don't want to be seen, and you want to make sure of it, you have to pay. Something she noticed that Garrus had become easily adapted to. He would have to wouldn't he? She let the thought run through her mind. For a moment she thought about if that bothered her. The truth was, it didn't. Garrus was always on the fringe of C-Sec. Hell he was on the fringe with her on the Normandy. These things had to be done and she knew it. It was just odd to see him so easily a part of it was all.

They made their way to the skycar and he finally spoke to her as he put their bags in the back. He fumbled with the keys a bit before taking a deep breath and letting out a sigh.

"Thank you for your help with this Shepard." He fumbled for a split second. Again something only Jane would have likely noticed. She waited for him to say more and he finally did.

"Let's get moving. I need to get away from this place."

She nodded and they left in the skycar for the docks. It wasn't long before they were back on the Normandy. They didn't say much to each other as they seperated on the ship. Jane made her way to her cabin and Garrus to the main battery. Jane connected with EDI shortly after she entered the cabin.

"EDI, what's next on our stops?" She stood waiting for the AI to answer her. 

"Our next stop is Tuchanka. Though we are close to the Krogan DMZ, there are several security clearances we must obtain from the new Krogan Clan Leader. It will take several day cycles."

Jane tugged on her bottom lip as she listened. It was a habit she had started when she was a teenager. If she was thinking about something and no one was nearby, or she was comfortable with who she was around, she would tug on her bottom lip. She sighed and nodded. 

"I'm going to be taking the next 24 hours off EDI. I'll be checking on the crew, but otherwise please forward any bridge issues to Joker, security issues to Jacob, and all other issues to Miranda. Please let Miranda know that if there are any major issues to come and find me. Otherwise, I'm not to be disturbed for business related issues. Understood?"

She didn't have to wait long before she heard the familiar "Understood Commander."

Once that was solved, Jane decided to take a hot shower and have a glass of wine while she went over the upcoming missions and dossiers the Illusive Man had for them. As she stood in the shower, letting the hot water run down her hair and back, she let her mind drift. Normally, letting her mind drift allowed her to focus on an issue that was important. Her mind would pick something and that's what she would put as a priority.

This time her mind floated to Garrus. Sitting on the floor, drinking his beer, eating food, and looking at her. That small smile that had come across his face had made her stomach clench. It was that clench you get in school when the crush you have notices you. She tried to shake off the memory, but her brain wouldn't let her. This is what it needed to focus on and come hell or high water it was going to.

She finally gave into it, under the hot water, with her fingers running shampoo through her hair. This time when he smiled at her, she crawled toward him. She touched his face with her cupped hand and kissed him gently. Her lips barely touching his. Unaccustomed to the feel of a turian mouth. She pulled back only to have him go with her. His lips barely leaving hers. He went onto his knees as she went back onto the bed. Her leading and him following. 

His stomach came in contact with the bed, his knees in contact with the beds platform. His hands touched her hips and gripped them subtly but possessive. She groaned into his mouth at the touch. As she groaned, her mouth opened slightly and his tongue found its way to hers. A low rumble filled his chest as he crawled on the bed pushing her back. His body gliding over hers as his hand traced gently almost ghosting down her neck, between her breasts, and finally at the end of her cotton shirt that he had bought her. 

She gasped and he pulled back. Instead of stopping him, she reached down and pulled her top off, exposing her sports bra and her bare stomach. He reached up, pulling down one cup of the sports bra and tracing his tongue around her exposed nipple. She gasped again, hips arching to him. As her hips arched to him, Garrus groaned and reached down roughly. His hand working his pants and finally shifting them down to expose his plates and give his cock room to move.

She continued to kiss him as they both fumbled with her pants, Finally pulling down the yoga pants and kicking them off, she looked at him. Their eyes met and she felt him against her. She gasped as he teased and rubbed her wetness with the tip of his cock. Her legs spread more as his head came down to the crook of her neck. He licked at her skin as he pushed into her heat and began moving in and out of her slowly. 

It didn't take long for their speed to pick up. Their breathing becoming erratic, their movements becoming just as fast paced. Her legs were gripping him and pulling him into her as he gasped. She felt it building up in her. As she gasped his name he said hers and she felt herself pulsing around him cumming hard as he pulsed inside of her. 

Shepard gasped and came on her fingers that were buried inside of her. Her eyes opened, the warm water still running over her. She had slid down the shower wall and was now on the floor, legs spread, fingers moving inside of her, and the thoughts of Garrus and what could have been just the night before dancing in her head.

As she came down from her orgasm she caught her breath. Standing, she rinsed off and turned the water off. She stumbled with weak thighs to the sink and mirror and looked at herself. What the hell had gotten into her? This was Garrus after all. He would never….would he?

She shook off the thought, brushed her teeth, dressed, and walked into the main part of the cabin. Pouring herself a glass of wine, she sat back on the sofa looking at the fish tank letting the calmness she felt take over.


	18. Hot Showers and a Cold Battery

Garrus made his way to the main battery. The truth was he didn't know what to say to Shepard. It was what it was. He had a vendetta to take out and he did it. He asked her help and she gave it. There was one less regret walking around the galaxy in his world. For better or worse, nightmares or not, it was over. He and the souls of his team could now rest in peace. The families that a few of them had could go on knowing that the man that caused the deaths was no longer walking. Hopefully, that would bring some comfort. Beyond that, there was nothing to say.

He walked to the back of the battery and put his bag down beside the cot he had set up. He leaned on the doorway that created the entry to the small sleeping room. He should be relieved. It was over. One last thing to contend with. One last ghost to worry with. In a way, he was relieved. The problem was, through handling this little issue of his, he had found himself in a whole new issue. 

Truth be told, he had never meant to stay the night. He wasn't even sure why he had. That was a lie. He knew exactly why he did it. They had found Harken. They knew he would contact Sidonis. Garrus knew it would be set up for the next morning. Anything sooner than that would be too fast and too strange. It would tip Sidonis off. He knew that Harken would know that, and for all of Harken's shit, he wouldn't want to deal with Garrus at the end of the day. So, it was no surprise when he heard the time Harken gave him to meet. 

Garrus could have gone back to the Normandy and just asked Shepard to stay docked overnight to finish the job in the morning. Sure he could have. He didn't though. She asked him what next and instead of saying to come back in the morning and finish it all, he took them to a hotel he knew of. One of the hotels that would accept money for discreteness and a blind eye. He didn't even think about it. He just…..did it.

She didn't argue it either. Whatever he needed to do, she was there. Walking through hell for him just like had for her. No one had ever done that for him. His father had always questioned whatever moves he made. Any friends were so hardcore turian they just went with orders. It wasn't about friendship really. Duty sure, but don't break the rules while you are doing it. Even former lovers questioned things. No one just picked up their ruck and followed him with no question out of a devotion to him. 

That scared the shit out of him.

So, he did the most logical thing he could think to do. He paid for a small room and trapped them in it overnight with food, a television, and his rifle. He figured if things went sideways and he did something stupid he had the rifle and could finish the job the launcher had started back on Omega. If things went well, whatever it was his emotionally driven impulsiveness wanted to go well, then he would come out of it with some knowledge of Shepard he didn't have. So, a win either way. Which were odds he liked.

He went down to the showers and found that it was so late that the men's showers were deserted. He stepped into the last shower cubicle, moved the privacy curtain, and flipped on the hot water. A few minutes later he stepped in and closed the curtain as he leaned into the hot stream. His eyes closed and he turned to the hot water letting it hit his head and face. Finally, he leaned with his hands bracing his body and leaned his head down so the water could hit the back of his neck. He was trying desperately to clear his mind. It wasn't working. 

Everytime he tried to clear his mind the image of Shepard stepping out of the bathroom with her damp hair came to mind. He had been working on the rifle. The truth was he was occupying himself with the rifle. There were a few things he needed to do, sure, but nothing major or nearly as time consuming as he made it appear. He was noting things about her the whole time. He didn't mean to. It was just happening. 

He was watching how she ate, what she ate, how she sat when she started to get comfortable. When she came out of the shower, toweling her hair, that's what did him in. He looked up from the rifle and his eyes locked on her. Not just locked on her, oh no. He saw Jane. He saw every curve, every movement, and every scar. He saw the way she ran her towel through her hair to dry it a bit more. He saw the woman that was behind the uniform. He had never had a thing for humans. He had some friends at C-Sec who had, but they talked about humans more as a fetish than anything else. The closest he had gotten to anything sexual or romantic was with an asari shop owner that he dated for several months. He wasn't turned off by humans, but he couldn't say they did anything for him either. At least not until this. 

In his mind, as the hot water ran over his skin and the back of his neck, he kept trying to get that image to go away. Replace Jane with anything else. Replace her with work that needed to be done, with a book he wanted to read, literally anything at all. Everytime, the new topic would replace her she would come right back. He finally gave in. He finally let his mind carry on with what it wanted rather than what had happened.

He stood up from his spot on the floor. Jane's head was down as she toweled her hair. She was talking about how great the shower felt when he approached her. He reached out slowly and took the towel from her, revealing her tousled black hair. She lifted her head and made eye contact with him. She said his name and he cut her off by gently running the back of his talons from her shoulder down her arm as he stepped into her space. His forehead touched hers, in one of the signs of affection his people had to offer.

To his surprise, she nuzzled her forehead against his just slightly, almost like a whisper. He ran his talons back up her arm and took in a deep breath. His free hand moved around to her hip, resting for a moment, before moving to the small of her back and pulling her to him. She gasped and he smirked a bit. 

"I like that sound." He said in a soft low whisper. She trembled a bit in response and bit her bottom lip.   
Moving his forehead a bit he guided her to tilt her head up to him. He remembered kissing his asari ex-girlfriend and was fairly certain the movement would be the same. He was right. As his mouth touched hers he felt her lips move against him. He moaned a bit, causing her to moan in return and her mouth to open just a bit. He took the opportunity and gently touched the tip of his tongue to her bottom lip. Her lips opened further at the touch. She moaned and moved closer to him, wrapping her arms around him, when his tongue finally touched hers. 

It didn't take long for the soft and sensual kiss to become heated. Their breathing increased, as did the need to be closer. Garrus broke the kiss for a short moment to guide Jane to the bed. He sat down guiding her next to him. Looking in her eyes, he silently asked for permission as his talon ran along the strap of her shirt. Jane blinked and leaned back just a bit. He watched as she lifted her shirt off followed shortly by her sports bra. He reached out and ran his hand softly along the side of her neck to the back of her neck. Cupping her neck he leaned in and kissed her again.

Pushing her back on the bed, his kiss intensified. His tongue seeking and probing any part of her mouth he could. Each time his tongue moved over hers it sent a warm shockwave through him. Groaning he moved them fully on the bed before placing his body over hers fully. He withdrew from her mouth and began kissing and licking down her neck, between her breasts and down to her waist. A low rumbling growl escaped his chest as his hands glided over her hips and his talons hooked on her yoga pants. 

He pulled them down slowly and as he did he kissed each of her hips, then her thighs, her knees, her calves, and finally her ankles as he knelt on the floor and removed her pants completely. As he moved back onto the bed, he let his hands trail over her warm smooth legs and back to her hips. He stopped at her thighs, kissing the inner right thigh then the inner left. He let a warm breath trail over her wetness as he looked up at her slowly. Her face was flushed, her breathing erratic, her lip tucked between her top teeth. She was exactly like he wanted her to be. 

He let out a soft deep chuckle and let his head fall again as he ran his tongue gently over her. A gasp filled the room and he dove his tongue deeper. Licking in long well placed licks up and down her clit. She was so wet and sweet for him, he almost lost control. He held it together and kept going. His hands trailing along her hips, to her flat stomach, up to her chest, and back. Softly, gently, and working in time to the licks he was placing on her.

When her hands dropped to his shoulders pulling him into her, he did what she silently asked. He ran his tongue in one long slow lick down her clit then inside of her in a deep long wet thrust. She gasped out as he began moving his tongue inside of her. Sucking on her gently as his tongue moved. As her breath picked up his speed picked up. He heard a breathless gasp and felt her body tense around him. He fumbled only for a moment as his hand reached and grabbed for hers. Clasping her hand as she rode his tongue through her orgasm. 

When she began to relax, he wasted no time. He quickly moved up her body. His plates had shifted halfway through the pleasure he was giving her. He was hard, ready, and needed to feel her. He had a desire to be as close to her as he could and nothing would be close enough. He looked in her eyes, cupping her face, and placed his forehead to hers. She grabbed onto him, wrapping her legs around him as he drove into her in one long smooth thrust. 

They both let out moans, their breaths frantic. He winced from the warmth and pleasure she brought him as she was wrapped around him. He began to move slowly at first. Taking in every feeling, every heat filled stroke, every moan, every gasp. He heard her whisper the word more. He gladly gave her all she could handle. His thrusts picked up, moving faster and faster inside of her. His hand moving down and grasping her thigh and pulling her leg up more so her knee was halfway up his chest. He thrusted her harder as he felt his own orgasm building. 

He whispered her name and she returned the favor as he started to pulse inside of her. He moaned out and felt her body gripping to him as they came at the same time. He pulsed a few more times inside of her and slowed down his thrusts. 

He gasped as he felt the water of the shower go cold. His hand was wrapped around his cock and he was breathing heavy. He finished the shower quickly and stepped out. Grabbing the towel, he wrapped it around his waist and stepped to the mirrors and sinks. He grabbed hold of the sides of the sink and looked up into the mirror. 

"Fuck sakes Vakarian. What are you thinking?"

He shook his head. She can find something closer to home. She wouldn't….would she? 

He looked at himself one more time in the mirror before shaking off the whole thing, getting dressed, and heading back to the battery.

He checked a few things and walked back to his bunk. He threw himself down and laid looking at the ceiling. As he drifted to sleep, the image of Jane laying in his arms came back to his mind, and he let it.


	19. Of Maws and Homes

Shepard ran and took cover behind a pillar that she was certain would be taken out shortly. Everything on Tuchanka was on its last leg. She was right. She took aim and fired only to have the thresher maw attack and take out the pillar. She winced and took a quick look around while the thresher maw went back underground. Garrus shouted at her from behind a set of stairs. She took the chance she could make it and ran across, hitting the ground, and rolling hoping she would roll to cover.

Garrus winced when he saw her running towards him. Grunt was busy doing what krogan do and taunting the damned thing as he raised his rifle to fire as soon as it showed back up. Shepard did a tuck and roll and Garrus saw she was going to be just out of reach from cover. He cursed under his breath, came out from cover for a split second, and wrapped his arm around her waist pulling her roughly to him and getting her in cover just as the thresher maw showed back up in the line of sight. 

Shepard scrambled up to cover, took a shot at the thing, and got back in cover quickly. She was facing Garrus when he repeated her actions and took cover again.

"Why in hell does a coming of age have to involve three levels of violence, an opening playing field, and our asses hanging out to dry?!?" She screamed into the winds that were sweeping around them kicking up the dust of the entire planet.

Garrus shook his head, poked back out of cover, fired, and went back into cover. "Krogan. Just, damned Krogan. If this is what they call a rite of passage to adulthood, I'd hate to see their mating customs."

Shepard laughed and jumped out of cover to take a shot at the maw. She wasn't sure if they were making any headway on the damned thing or not. She took two more shots and got back into cover. 

"You know, I bet if you looked hard enough you could find some krogan porn on Omega or…." She laughed when he glared at her.

"Not helping Shepard." He took two shots and slid back behind the steps. They could hear Grunt yelling, taunting, and having the time of his short little life. 

They both shook their heads wincing at the shots the thresher maw was sending their way. 

"So, I take it this isn't how turians handle this particular stage of life?" She smirked and winced as one of the maw's shots almost got her in the face.

Garrus winced with her, cursed, lifted up and took a shot, then took cover again. "No. We do one of three things. Ignore it and let the kid figure it out on their own, toss a book at the kid and let them read it on their own, or get them an asari stripper and let her help with the education."

She laughed, feeling the adrenaline pumping through her. This was the part of fighting that most of the crew hated about Shepard and Garrus. They would always somehow find their way to the same cover and they would banter like this. Both fighting at their optimal levels, having a blast, and going with the moment. Drove others crazy. 

"For me it was a bit later. I was 19, he was 24. A gun was involved." She said before pointing at another point of cover behind another set of stairs. They made the run for it and took cover quickly enough.

"How as a gun involved?" He asked as he took aim and fired.

"Oh, he was a range instructor. He was um, very good at what he taught." 

They both laughed and popped up finishing off the maw and hearing a horn sound. Within a few hours they were back in front of Wrex and Grunt's rite of passage was done. Wrex invited them to stay for a bit and catch up. They agreed. 

They moved with Wrex to what appeared to be a private set of rooms. One of them had a somewhat civilized table and some food laid out. Shepard went to an area to wash up while Garrus sat with their old friend. As soon as she was out of earshot Wrex looked at Garrus.

"Are you serious? You haven't made a single move yet have you? What is wrong with you turians?"

Garrus blinked and looked at his friend of the mug he was drinking from. 

"What are you talking about you old beast?" He asked as he took a sip of the ale.

"Garrus, if I had even a one quad chance at that, I would have already claimed it. Especially since the veil tried to take her once. I'd be damned if it would get another shot."

He took a sip of his drink and looked at his turian friend. Garrus took a strong sip of his ale and swallowed, seemingly pondering it for a moment.

"It's not like that. She's not...what I mean is.." He stammered for a minute and the krogan clan lord didn't let it go unnoticed.

"What you mean is you don't have the quad to do anything so you will sit and stare while someone else comes along."

Garrus growled a little in his chest. "I'm not her type."

Wrex bark laughed and clapped Garrus hard on the back. "The woman has a subscription to Fornex. Everything's her type."

Garrus was about to open his mouth when Shepard came back in. She took a seat and a few minutes later, after some laughs, Garrus excused himself for a moment.

When he was out of earshot, Wrex turned to Shepard and nodded. He took a sip of his drink and cleared his throat.

"I can't believe it. The strongest female I've ever met. A sister to me. Stronger than most. Yet, here you are. Such a sad day."

She looked up from her drink and laughed. "What are you talking about Wrex? Why is it sad?"

He shook his head. "A perfect male, well after me of course. He is right there for the taking and the strongest female i know is just letting him move right by because she just doesn't have the quad to do anything. Pitiful."

She blinked at him and took a sip of her drink. Swallowing hard she shook her head. "I'm not his type."

"You know your way around nearly every damn firearm there is. You can best damn near anyone in hand to hand combat drills. You are a fighter, but can offer sympathy when necessary. You enjoy the bar as much as you enjoy a good book or movie. You are compassionate and fierce. Yes, you are totally not his type. That the spirits you pointed that out. Now, you can sit back and watch as someone less of a female than you comes by and takes him for her own. Good plan."

Just as she was about to say something, Garrus came back in the room. The three continued to talk into the wee hours of the morning. Garrus pausing to take in Jane a bit. Jane doing the same. Wrex knowing exactly what seeds he had planted. 

Jane stood and faltered a bit from the drinking. Wrex laughed and Garrus put his arm around her waist to hold her up. Wrex laughed.

"Take the lightweight back to her cabin turian. Careful with her. She's precious cargo to clan Urdnot."

They clasped hands and nodded at each other. Garrus got Shepard back to the shuttle. As the shuttle took off to the Normandy, Shepard leaned against his shoulder. He put his arm around her shoulders out of total instinct. She nuzzled into him more and he closed his eyes. Leaning his head back, he took in her smell. He listened to each breath she took. He felt her chest rise and fall against him. He shook his head and told himself he was just setting himself up for a huge fall when she got something closer to home. He also told himself to take this moment to be as close to her home as he could be and to take it all in.


	20. One Week in Hell

Illium was a beautiful planet. Shepard had to give it that. It bothered her on a few levels though. The first was that it was too clean and too presentable to be as clean and presentable as it was. She had been to several planets like that. The rule of thumb was that there were only two reasons you would be met as soon as you got to the planet docking area. They were both for the same reasons just on different ends of the social scale. Someone in charge wanted to know why you were there, wanted you to meet with them as soon as your feet could take you there, and they wanted to keep tabs on you. No one who was part of the general public, just passing through or doing business, was going to be met at the docking bay.

On Omega, within two minutes, Shepard had been met at the docking bay by one of Aria's people. Now, she stood with an asari representative in front of her. Sure she was nicer than the guard Aria had sent, but her message was basically the same. Her boss wanted to see Shepard. This time, the boss was Liara. When she found that out she glanced at Garrus. He shook his head and looked out over the docking area. 

Shepard told the representative that she would make her way to Liara as soon as possible and thanked her for her assistance. As they walked off, Shepard stopped and looked at Garrus.

"Did you know about this?" She asked as she, Garrus, and Kasumi looked out over the skyline of Illium. 

He shook his head. "I heard rumors about where she had gone and what she was doing. I had no idea this rumor was somewhat true. All I know is that she deals in information. A bit too dangerous for my tastes, but if it works for her. Basically she gets the information on things that people shouldn't know about it and sells it to the highest bidder."

Jane looked at him and then to Kasumi. Kasumi looked over at her and shrugged. 

"I prefer to deal in hard objects that I can deny if I'm caught with...which is rare, but still. Information? Hell no. That's all in your head and since you are the only one carrying it, you are the first one to go down with the ship."

Garrus nodded. "Indeed. So, should we make our way to her?"

Jane shook her head and looked out at the skyline as she tugged on her bottom lip. 

"I suppose. What's on your mind though?"

Garrus was leaning with both hands on the balcony edge as he looked over the skyline and down to the busy areas below.

"Not much. It's just something i learned at C-Sec. Illium looks great with the sleek designs and perfectly arranged buildings. At the end of the day, it's no different than Omega. Don't let it fool you. Walk down the wrong alley, step into the wrong area, and it can be just as bad as any street of Omega can."

He pushed himself back and stood dusting off his hands. Kasumi nodded agreeing with him. 

She took a breath and looked around. "Place makes my teeth itch Shep. Can we get out of here as quick as possible?"

Jane agreed with both of them. She may like the colors of the area, but the planet itself screamed "wrong place wrong time".

They made their way through the stock and broker area and towards Liara's office. They had a very quick meeting and reunion, if you wanted to call it that. Garrus noted that Shepard didn't seem like she knew how to react. She was going through the motions and that was it. She asked Liara about both Samara and Thane and found out the locations she needed. She also asked Liara how she could help her with the Shadow Broker. It didn't take long for Liara to tell her exactly what she could do to help. Shepard agreed to help and left the office.

Kasumi was the first to ask her anything. "Are you okay? It can't be easy seeing a close friend like that, under these circumstances."

Shepard nodded. "I'm fine. It is what it is. Let's just help her, pick up the other day, and then go on about our business."

Garrus didn't like the way Shepard was handling this, but it wasn't anything he felt like he could help her with. She was right. It is what it is. He would help her, talk to her, let her rant, whatever she needed when she approached him herself.

The truth was, it didn't take long for her to approach them. They found Samara. They recruited Thane. They helped Liara. It all transpired over the course of a week and ended with them standing on the Shadow Broker's ship with Liara as the new Shadow Broker running the entire show. It had been a whirlwind, like most of the things that he did with Shepard.

When it was all over and they made it back to the ship, Garrus thought it was finally time to take a break. He was wrong. The minute they walked through the CIC they were informed that Jane needed to meet with the Illusive Man. When she came onto the crew deck half an hour later, she looked exhausted and stressed. She headed straight for the battery, walked in, and sat down on some crates.

"I need you to tell me again that you are willing to walk into hell. I need you to understand that this hell leads right into a suicide mission. If you want out Garrus, I totally understand and will respect your….."

She was cut off. He shook head and put his hand on her shoulder. When she didn't look up, he put a talon under her chin and made her look up.

"I'm here. I'm going with you. If you go, I am there. If you die, I go with you. Period. It scares the shit out of me, but it is the way it is. Where is our first stop?"

She had to admire how calm Garrus was about the whole thing. He had made up his mind and that was it. She nodded and told him about the collector ship. It was dead in space from what she understood. They were to go on, get the info they needed, and get the hell off. He nodded and asked when. 

"We are on a course now. Garrus, I….thank you."

He nodded and took in a deep breath before turning to make sure his equipment was ready.

A few hours later he, Shepard, and Miranda found themselves on platforms inside of a collector ship. They had already found out more than they bargained for about the protheans, collectors, and some of the collectors plan. Now, they were just trying to get out. 

"84 percent." EDI's voice rang out over the platform and gunfire.

"EDI get us out of here!" Jane yelled.

"I am tasked to capacity." was the only response she received. 

Jane shook her head and kept firing. EDI finally took control of the platform. She informed them that the collector ship was a trap, but she did get the information they needed to get through the Omega 4 relay.

They didn't have much chance to take it all in. Another attack started and they had to run. MIranda simply followed, but Garrus was cursing the whole way. Jane knew why. Another betrayal and he didn't like it.

They finally got to the shuttle and made their way to the conference room. They began discussing the IFF and the Omega 4 relay. Once they went through it, that was it. Shepard decided to keep building up the team and Garrus agreed with her. As everyone left the conference room, Garrus stayed behind.

"This has been a week of hell Jane. Please take a break. Come up for air. Something."

She looked up at him. It was rare for him to ask anything like that of anyone, especially her. She nodded.

"Okay, how does this sound. We build up the team and we take a shore leave of sorts. We can't do it on the CItadel. Cerberus isn't welcome there. Illium is an option with Azure and other areas. Omega? Is it even an option?"

Garrus crossed his arms and leaned against the wall. "Um, should be fine. Why Omega though?"

Shepard sighed. "Samara has something she needs help with. We would be there anyway."

Garrus nodded and sighed. "I'll help anyway I can with Samara's issue on one condition. You let me treat you to an afternoon, one full night, and the next day to what Omega has to offer. No ranks. Just friends having fun. Agreed?"

Jane nodded. "Sounds good."

He smiled and walked out of the room leaving Jane to smile to herself.


	21. Afterlife Moments

Jane headed out of the docking area wearing a short black dress, heels, and her hair down past her shoulders in soft curls. She was wearing a simple silver necklace and matching bracelet. Her makeup was done in a nighttime look that was subtle, but just encouraging enough to onlookers. As she walked out of the docking area she rolled her eyes and blushed slightly. Standing in front of her waiting were Garrus and Zaeed. Zaeed was looking her up and down and Garrus stood straight from where he had been leaning back against the wall.

"Shepard, I had no idea you cleaned up to look like an actual female. Very nice." He smiled and Shepard smiled back. Normally, she would not have taken what he said that well, but this time she did.

She was not used to that kind of attention, so she blushed when she got it. Her hand moved up to her hair and pulled on a curl a bit. That's when she caught sight of Samara. She nodded at the two men and glanced at Samara.

"I'll be in Afterlife soon. Take your places. Let's do this, get out, and get to our shore leave." She walked off and made her way to Samara to discuss things one more time.

She was out of earshot when Zaeed tapped Garrus on the arm. "That is one hell of a female. She can fire any weapon, is amazing in hand to hand combat, takes no shit off anyone, and she cleans up to look like every man's fantasy. That is the kind of female you walk into the first of hell with and enjoy the sparks that fall from the sky when it's over."

Garrus nodded and let out a sigh. "So, true. So very true."

A few minutes later Zaeed had taken his place at the bar on the lower level of Afterlife. Garrus was moving through the back areas of the bar to stay out of sight and scope out the dance floor and public areas. He was running through 18 different security issues in his head when he saw Shepard walk up the small hallway that lead out from Afterlife to the Omega shops.

He turned and smiled at her. They were alone in the hallway that had the dim red hue from the lighting. The music was thumping a hard beat that could be heard faintly and felt harshly in the small hallway. Garrus turned to her and smiled. She glanced at him up and down and moved a little closer, letting her fingers trail down his bare arm.

"No armor tonight Vakarian? I think I like this look." He was wearing a shirt that showed his bare arms and neckline. His pants were something similar to upscale gym pants and his boots matched the black of the pants. She had seen turians dress like this before at clubs and was told by Jack that i was a way for them to let single females know they were single. 

Shepard let her hand trail off of his arm. Garrus smirked and looked her over. "Hmm, I might be able to get used to this new look from you as well. You look amazing Shepard. Just one thing. You want to look like you are single and out to get a piece? You need to show off some skin."

She didn't know what to think at first of his laid back conversational tone and wording. She was used to only hearing him like this when drinks were involved and when he was referring to other people as they people watched a bar. She looked down trying to figure out where in the hell she could have shown more skin. She gasped a bit when she felt his hand take hold of her hair that was draped over the right shoulder and down her front. 

He moved in close to her where she could feel the heat of his breath on her skin. She didn't notice that as he moved the hair behind her shoulder he smelled her scent at her neckline. It was everything he could do not to touch more, say more, do more. He knew the instant he smelled her it was a mistake. He leaned back and smiled rubbing her arm slightly and moving back against the wall. Her neck was now exposed and so was the softness of her shoulder.

"There, now the turians will know you are single, the humans will have just enough to look at, the asari will have everything they need to file away for later, and the baterians will see that soft curve of your shoulder and that's all they will need. Killing mercs wasn't the only thing I learned on Omega." He smirked at her and she let out a soft chuckle.

She was just about to say something when he tapped her hand that was resting on her waist. His fingers touched her waist slightly and he felt his entire body vibrate. He pointed over to the bar and towards Samara's daughter Morinth. 

"There she is. You better get going. We'll be here if you need us." 

As she turned he let his hand trail along her waist to her lower back. He didn't have to do it of course, but how could he not. He had to feel her skin, the curve of her waist, and hip bones, anything before she walked off. 

He watched her walk away and he took in a deep breath. He shook his head and muttered to himself, "What the fuck are you doing Vakarian. Get it together."

He didn't realize his coms were on until he heard Zaeed in his ear. "You're being a bloody fool and if you don't jump on it soon, I will."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's going a bit slow guys. I promise I'm getting there. I'm hoping that when some of you read this first then re-read (or read) Fire on the Horizon, it will all come together. Thank you again for the support.


	22. Reach, Flexibility, and Taking Chances

Shepard finished up with Morinth and left Samara to deal with the few Omega authorities that showed up. She made her way back to the Normandy to change clothes and get some things for shore leave set up. It didn't take her long to get everything ready to go and to wash the stench of that mess with Morinth off her. After she had everything ready to go and checked in with EDI to confirm she would be on Omega, she headed to the main battery.

Garrus was getting some final things in order himself. He turned around when she stepped in and smiled. "Shepard? Need me for something?"

"Just wanted to see if you wanted to talk or head to Omega with me?" She was half expecting him to tell her he had calibrations to do. He didn't though. He smiled and closed the doors behind her as he moved over to the console.

"Sure, I was just finishing up some things then we can head out." He moved over to lean on the console as she took her seat on the crates near his workbench.

"I was just thinking about how weird it is to be getting ready for a big mission on this ship. A human ship is so different from a turian vessel." He said as he looked at her.

She leaned forward and quirked an eyebrow. "How are things different on a turian ship?"

He began pacing as he spoke to her. "Our commanders run us tight, but they know we need to blow off steam. They have hand to hand combat, simulators, other options. I remember, we were getting ready to hit a batarian pirate squad. Very risky. A recon scout and I had been at each other's throats. Nerves mostly. She suggested we settle it in the ring."

"I assume you took her down gently?"

"Actually she and I were the top hand to hand specialists on the ship. I had reach, but she had flexibility. After nine rounds they called it a draw. It was brutal. There were a lot of upset betters in the training room that day. Afterwards, she suggested we settle it in her quarters. I had reach, but she um, she had flexibility."

He chuckled a second. "More than one way to blow of steam I guess."

Jane nodded and smiled. She almost stopped herself, but decided to actually see what was going on between them. She stood up and took a breath. Now or never she told herself. 

"It sounds like you're carrying some tension. Maybe I could help you get rid of it?" She began moving towards him slowly.

"I didn't think you'd feel like sparing Commandar." He said a bit too stiff and officially. 

Shepard shook her head and reached out to touch his arm. "How about we skip to the tiebreaker. We could test your reach and my flexibility."

He blinked. "Oh, I didn't…. I never knew you had a weakness for men with scars."

His brain was working overtime. All the flirting, all the glances, all the fantasies. Yet, here she stood in front of him. Confident, willing, and offering.

"Why the hell not. There's no one in this galaxy I respect more than you. If we can figure out a way to make it work. Yeah, definitely." 

She smiled at him and nodded. "Good, um….funny I didn't expect you to say yes. Look Garrus, I know it's shore leave. I didn't mean right now. Just, well….I'm not trying to…"

He cut her off and hugged her gently. He pulled back and looked at her. "How about this? How about we go on for shore leave and let things play by ear. Enjoy the shore leave, let some steam out, and see where we are. Let's see what's here." He motioned between them.

She nodded. "Sounds good. I was going to head to Omega before I came here. I guess I'll just go get my things and head there. Where is the hotel room?"

Garrus smiled. "I'll go with you. To be honest, I rented out a suite of rooms for us and the crew can just come and go as they please. Myself, you, Joker, Zaeed, Kasumi, Miranda, Jacob, Thane, Tali, Samara, and Mordin have a room on Omega itself. I hope that's okay?"

Jane nodded. "It's perfect."

He nodded and they both got there things. As they headed to the shuttle for Omega Garrus felt like he was in something surreal. The woman he had a crush on since he met her on the Citadel almost three years ago was now at this side. She wanted to blow of steam. Sure it was a one night stand, probably, but it was one night more than he ever hoped for. He was going to make sure she was happy, even if it was for that one night. If nothing else, they would have a memorable night before throwing it all to the wind.

Shepard felt Garrus put his arm around her waist as they walked onto the shuttle for Omega. She had to admit, she liked the way it felt. She liked the way his warmth felt. She liked having him this close to her. She was shocked that he had said yes. Her heart was beating through her chest. She wanted this to work, even if it was for one night. That's all she wanted. She let her hand touch his, let her guard down, she just hoped she was making the right move. Otherwise this shore leave was going to be one to forget rather than remember.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally. I felt like I was never going to get to this part. Now we can move forward and get the good stuff going of this romance story. Thanks guys for sticking with this journey with me. I really appreciate it guys! More to come tomorrow and through the weekend.


	23. Shore Leave Desperation

When they walked off the shuttle to Omega, Garrus took Jane off to the side for a moment. She laughed a bit and looked at him as she grabbed her bag. "A private talk? Already? I haven't even had the chance to go through your omni tool and defame you across the galaxy. Hell, I haven't even had a drink yet."

He chuckled. She had a way of making him laugh. He grabbed his bag and moved in closer to her. He took a chance and let his hand touch her wrist. His voice was low and husky. It made her skin shiver in a way she hadn't felt since her days in training.

"So, before we go on shore leave, how much do we want our closer friends to see or know? I mean, is there anything to know? Now I sound desperate. Unless, you are okay with desperate then I'm incredibly desperate." He kept that straight face that always made her laugh. No one else really, because they said they couldn't read him. She knew, at least the majority of the time, when he was joking.

"Well, a little is fine." She smirked and looked up at him, allowing herself to flirt a little and let her fingers touch his. 

"A little? As in they can know a little or a little desperation?" He cocked his head and she had to look down. His hand was entertwined with hers. Her heartbeat was going faster, her breath was faster, she actually felt herself blush. She half glanced up at him. 

"They are our friends, so they can know whatever you want them to. The crew isn't around, at least not at the private suite of rooms you arranged for us. Desperation? A little is fine. It's actually intriguing coming from you." She laughed at the look of fake shock he gave her.

He tugged on her hand and brought it up to his lips. He stroked her fingers with one of his talons and kissed the tips of her fingers gently. His voice got softer and he took a deep swallow.

"I don't want the crew to know, if you don't mind. They will find out eventually, but no need to get the rumor mill starting. Our friends, like Tali and Joker, hell they will know the minute they see us even if we are totally apart. Honestly, I want two things. One, I want some time just for us before we go through the relay. Some quiet before the storm."

He paused as he felt her other hand touch his hip. He looked in her eyes as she softly replied to him. "I want that too Garrus."

His smile became softer, more private, like it was a smile just for her. "Good to hear." 

He kept stroking her hand absently, like he was stuck in the moment. The truth was, she was stuck right there with him.

"The second thing?" Her voice was quiet.

"The second thing I want is to spend this shore leave like it is our last. Sounds morbid, but that's why I decided on getting the suite of rooms for us. But, as part of that idea, I want us to spend some time together. Just, together. No walls, no boundaries. Just, us having a good time. If that's okay."

The last part was when she noticed he was a tad nervous and seemed to be unsure of how he was wording everything. She knew what he meant. She decided to take a chance and lean up kissing him on the scars he got because of her, at least that's how she felt about them. 

"That's what would like too. I know it, well this between us, just sort of came up. But, I'd like to just relax with you. Yeah, that sounds nice actually."

He stepped back and smiled. "Good. Good to hear. So, let's go. There's one thing I need to do before we head over to the hotel. I'll be right back. Watch my bag?"

She nodded a he pointed at the bag. He leaned in and kissed her cheek quickly before heading off to a group of skycars. She watched him talking to the batarian there and laughing like they had shared some stories and jokes before. As she watched she felt a presence beside her.

"I wondered where you were. Good to see you again, Jane." She jumped a little and turned to see Jeff standing next to her. He put his arm around her shoulders and looked into the same direction she had been looking.

"You knew where I was the whole time. We were on the same shuttle." She smiled and kept watching Garrus in the distance.

"No, your body was here. Your mind was here. My Jane, the woman I call a friend and a sister, she wasn't here. I didn't see her until just now. I'm glad she's back." His hand rubbed her shoulder a little. 

"So, no bad comments about Garrus? No question about what's going on?" 

Jeff shook his head a little. "Nope. Here's the thing. It's something everyone was hoping would happen eventually. He is a good guy. Don't tell him I said that. The big guy already brings out the Jane we all miss. What's there to say bad about it? You're happy. Be happy Jane. Life is too short, you know that. Besides, we know where he sleeps. Tali and I already have this covered." 

She laughed at the last comment and leaned into him. Her hand touched his chest as she laughed for what seemed like the first time in months. 

Garrus walked back over and shook his head. "I leave you alone for a few minutes and you already found someone else. I see how it is." 

Jane laughed. "Well, you know he has that whole pilot thing going for him."

Garrus laughed and put his hand on her waist gently, cautiously. He found out quickly he didn't need to be cautious. She stepped right into his side and put her arm around his back. She glanced at Jeff who was smiling in approval. 

"Okay, let's head over to the hotel and get this party going. TIme to get so horribly drunk that only the people I trust should see me." Jeff said as he moved to the skycars.

Garrus and Jane, at the same time, said. "We shouldn't see it either."

Jeff turned around to see them both smiling at him. "Creepy fucks." 

All he heard was them laughing as they all made their way to the sky cars. What they didn't see was him smiling for the both of them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know there was no shore leave in this game, but like I said earlier, I felt like there was no lead up for these two. It was just kill Sidonis, "let's blow off steam", night of passion that you don't get much from, and omega 4 relay. I wanted to give more to lead into the romance of it all. I'm hoping you guys like it. Next is the shore leave, some alone time, so revelations, a few more missions, the relay, and then what happens when they make it out of the base.


	24. Shore Leave Problems

The shore leave went well for most of the crew. Shepard only had to deal with two minor incidents. One was with a younger crew member that was on her very first shore leave. That was always bound to end up with a bathroom and a sober driver. Then there was one of the crew that got into a fight with a human down in the shops. Everyone got some shopping time in, some bar time in, and some time in to tie up anything they needed to handle.

Shepard was pleasantly surprised with her time spent with Garrus and the other main crew. She had the chance to be around Garrus in a more relaxed environment. The first few days of the week were spent with him dodging people that might have seen him, until he finally said to hell with it. 

"What are they going to say? They saw Archangel? Good, maybe the ghost of me will put some fear in people." He had chuckled about it, but she knew that he was partially serious. 

They had spent some time eating out, caught a movie, drank through several bar fights, and tonight he insisted that she go dancing with them all. He had seen her dance so she wasn't sure why he thought it was a good idea. Joker, Tali, Miranda, and the rest were going to meet them at Afterlife. 

Shepard decided to just wear jeans a a black long sleeved vneck shirt. Her hair was down past her shoulders and she actually changed her makeup a bit. She put on some simple opal earrings and stepped out of the bathroom. She had to laugh because Miranda and Tali looked over to her and both made a comment to her about how she "cleaned up."

The females all came out of their side of the suite in time to catch the men coming out of their side. People began pairing off, walking, and talking as they made their way to the elevator. Garrus and Shepard were the last two. So far, they had just hung out and got to know each other much better than they already did. They had touched each other, held hands once or twice, and flirted but that was about it. So, nothing had really changed for them except there was more touching and fewer walls. 

She approached Garrus and smiled. He liked the way she looked somewhat shy tonight. He was wearing some civilian turian clothing, but she noticed his arm and neck weren't showing this time. She didn't ask about it, just took it in and noticed that it was different from the other nights they had been out or the night he had helped with Morinth.

He touched her arm and bent a bit to kiss her cheek. "You look nice. Are you sure that's the outfit you want to be in when people remember your failed attempt at dancing tonight?" He chuckled behind it and she laughed as well.

She cocked her hip and folded her arms across her chest. "Yeah, I'm sure big guy. You sure that's what you want to be in tonight when we have to drag your poor drunk turian ass back to the suite?"

He crooked his arm for her to slip hers through as they made it to the elevator. "Is that a drinking challenge Jane?"

She stepped into the elevator and hit the button. "Oh yeah. Definitely."

Jeff groaned. "Oh goodie. A who can match who drinking challenge between Shepard and Garrus. Oh joy. Because the one that happened on the Normandy when we went after Saren went so well."

Tali sighed. "Oh spirits. I forgot about that. I don't think there was a bottle left on the entire ship. Then, we had to find someone to carry them both back to their quarters."

Jeff nodded as the elevator doors opened. "Yeah and then the assholes didn't have the decency to have hangovers that we could pick on."

Jane laughed and felt Garrus put his hand at her lower back guiding her out of the elevator. 

"The nerve of us!" She had to laugh when Tali looked back and she knew she was glaring behind that mask.

They all made their way to the bar and to a corner area that was big enough for all of them. After a few hours, more than a few bottles down, and some sad attempts at dancing Jane and Garrus walked off to a small area that was on the bottom floor of the bar. It was the quietest spot in the whole area. No one was done there and there was just enough light for them to see each other.

Shepard was walking upright, which was a challenge given how much whiskey she had ingested. Garrus, however, looked totally fine. She knew it was a smoke and mirrors act, but still it was irritating that he could do this better than she could.

She turned around at a table, with her butt to the table itself. Her hands were turned so they could brace her against the table. She was smiling and attempting to hold herself up. Garrus, still, looked irritatingly sober.

He moved closer to her and put his hands on either side of hers on the table. 

"You madam, are drunk." He smirked and kept going. "I know because you actually performed a well executed dance move out there. Don't worry, I don't think anyone noticed."

She laughed a little and falterd almost slipping. Garrus moved quick and caught her, holding her up. Their foreheads touched and he let out a deep sigh. His free hand moved along her arm, up her back, and to the back of her neck. She could feel his entire body against hers. Feel every ripple of muscle, every breath, every part of him. When he brushed his forehead against her she nearly passed out. She finally let out a breath she didn't even realize she was holding. Her right hand came up and stroked his arm before she looked up and into his eyes. 

"I still want what we talked about. And, where this shore leave has been wonderful, there is still something I want to do. Something I need to do." His voice was deep, almost a whisper, and husky. She had always prided herself on being the strong independent woman. No man could shake her in or out of the bedroom. In fact, she was usually the one in charge in both arenas. Not this time. She was done for and she knew it.

She simply nodded and finally found her voice again. "And what is that?"

His hand came up and cupped her face, his thumb stroking her cheek slowly. He let his eyes glace slowly up and down her from her forehead to her shoulders and back up. His breathing was steady. He was the picture of calm. 

He leaned in slowly and her eyes closed. A few seconds later she felt his lips touch hers. It was an odd feeling, but not in a bad way. His lips were slightly stiff, but not rigid. They moved against hers and when he leaned into the kiss more, she found herself opening her mouth to him slightly. He took the invitation, sliding his tongue against hers gently at first. Her arms came up around his neck and the kiss intensified. Within a minute, or maybe it was a lifetime, her breath got faster. She began moving her hands over his body and he did the same. For every invitation she gave, he took readily. 

The kiss broke and his tongue traced along her neck to her ear. She gasped as her leg moved along his. He began to bend her over the table in that small dark corner of Afterlife. 

"Spirits Jane." He whispered in a guttural sound.

She reached up and her fingers grazed his fringe. He nearly came undone. His hand roughly moved down her side as he bent her over more. Her back was about to hit the table when they were cut off by a clearing of the throat.

They both stopped. Garrus kept his arms around her and turned his head to the doorway behind them. Shepard kept her hands where they were on his waist and looked around him. A smirk came across her face when she say one of Aria's batarian guards, Bray, standing there. He shook his head and shrugged.

"Aria sends her congrats on finally doing something about each other. She also says if you promise to stop your shit and get off her tables, she'll pay for a room. Just stop."

Shepard leaned into Garrus and laughed against his chest. He cleared his throat and stood her up completely pulling her to his side and nodding. 

"Apologies." His voice wasn't sorrowful at all. Just very plain with a hint of a laugh behind it.

He continued. "Tell Aria we have a room, but thank you."

Bray nodded and went to speak into his com when Aria's voice was heard in the entire room. "THEN USE IT!"

They both laughed as Bray shook his head and walked out of the small room leaving the two there laughing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll be finishing up this fiction in a few days or so. Next stop is the Collectors attacking the Normandy, the move through the Omega 4 Relay, the night before the Omega 4 Relay jump, and some of the aftermath of the final battle. Hope you like it!


	25. Doctors Recommendations

Returning to the ship was a shock to the system for the crew. The reality started to set in that this was in fact a suicide mission. Jane tried to keep everyone's moral up and it was killing her own. They nearly had the team finished and the next step was getting the IFF. Once it was in place, it would be time to make the Omega 4 jump and finish this mission. For better or worse.

Jane had decided to make her rounds on the ship. She was planning on seeing Garrus as her last stop. That kiss on shore leave had only prompted them to spend more time together. They both had admitted they liked it, that there was a spark. How could they not? Garrus had told her that was why he felt that he had to do it. He needed to make sure there was a connection once the flirting went away. That there was a spark between them. What neither had planned for was the sparks in the sky becoming full fireworks. 

Shepard made her way to see Mordin and smiled as she walked in. He was humming while working on some sort of experiment. 

"Do you have a minute to talk?" Jane asked as she approached him.

"Actually, wanted to talk. Medical matters. Aware that mission is dangerous. Different species react different to stress. Sexual activity normal stress relief for humans and turians. Still, recommend caution. Warn of chafing."

Jane nodded. "I intend to be cautious Doctor. Garrus is important to me. You're not gonna scare me off."

Mordin responded as professionally as possible. "Of course. Hormones. Regardless, come and see me later. May need chafing ointment."

Jane perked at that. She hadn't actually thought it would be a big deal. She had been near Garrus before. In fact, they had to strip down on one mission due to contaminants on their gear. They got close for body warmth and she didn't feel his skin or plates being too rough. The fact that Mordin mentioned it made her wonder.

"Do you have a recommendation as a doctor?"

Mording nodded at her question. "Turians based on dextro amino acids. Human ingestion of tissue could provoke an allergic reaction. So, don't….ingest. Also forwarding advice booklet to your quarters. Diagrams, positions comfortable for both species, erogenous zone overviews. Can supply oils to reduce discomfort. Gave EDI demonstration vids to use as necessary."

Jane thought about it for a minute. SOmething didn't sound right. She knew that asari had the same basic biology, at least sexual intercourse speaking, as human females. She knew that turians and asari dated, mated, and married often enough. The allergic reaction she could understand but the….

"Wait Mordin. You're just pulling my leg."

He stepped back and she actually saw him smirk. "Shocking accusation. Patient doctor relationship a sacred trust. Would never dream of mockery."

He smiled a bit more. "Have a good time Shepard."

A few minutes later Jane was sitting in front of Dr. Chakwas laughing over what Mordin had told her.

"I assure you Shepard, the only thing you need to worry about is a little chafing. If he has been with an asari, and you said he has, then he pretty much knows how to handle what happens when the light goes out. Though Mordin did have you going."

She began laughing about it as they shared some ice brandy. Shepard laughed into her glass. "Laugh it up. Go ahead. I'm nervous though."

"I would be too with those teeth of his. The back ones could rip through a rare steak." She said and poured some more.

Jane looked shocked and laughed when Chakwas let out a loud laugh at her friends facial expression.


	26. Eye of the Storm and Kill Switches

In a matter of days the crew had managed to get the Reaper IFF, collect a deactivated geth, talk to said geth, and have the crew abducted by collectors. It was too much. Even for the great Commander Shepard it was too much. She was pacing in her quarters as the walls started to close in on her. She nearly screamed and crawled out of her own skin. She finally took a walk to the CIC and to the cockpit. She stepped into the area quietly, coming up just behind Joker. 

"Commander." The voice was rather solemn, especially for Joker. 

Jane looked around and finally closed the small door to the cockpit. It was something that was done so rarely that most people didn't even know the door was there. She pushed back against the now closed door and slid down to the floor. Her elbows landing on her knees with her arms outstretched. She was looking at the floor, then to the space outside, and finally up to the ceiling. Jeff stayed silent the entire time. He waited for her to open her mouth and say something. He finally spoke.

"Do you know what you told me the first time we had a really heated evac? I was shaken pretty bad afterwards. Sure I knew I could do it in simulators, but this was the full blown real thing. I saved your life and got you, Garrus, and Liara the hell out of there. I was running on pure adrenaline. Two days later you came to my small room. You sat on the empty bunk across from me. No one was there but me and you. Do you remember what you said?"

Jane didn't look at him. She just shook her head slowly from left to right. Just once.

"Talk me through it." He took a deep breath.

"That's all you said. Talk me through it. So, I did. Two hours later I was done. I was an emotional wreck but I was done. You hugged me. I'll never forget how tight you gripped me. It wasn't a commander thing. It was a friend thing. A family thing. We went out and drank that night. We laughed. We breathed. We moved through it. I...I moved through it."

There was a long silence as Jane looked at the floor again, to her hands, and up slowly to Jeff. 

"Shepard. Talk me through it."

"There's a geth on my ship Joker. My crew has been abducted by Collectors. I'm about to walk into a suicide mission and have everyone follow me into hell itself. I was gone for two years. Call it death, a coma, a medical vacation. I was gone. I lost everything. My apartment, my life, my finance, my friends. I lost it all. The world I woke up to is not...it's not mine. I was always told the first step is the one you believe in. I took that step. This is the outcome. This….shit. What is this? Liara sells secrets for a living. Hell she is the one who...who brokered my body to Cerberus. Good intentions aside. Why did she do it? For me? No. For the "good of the galaxy". What a fucking joke. I'm a tool. I'm not here for me, for life, for the great mystery of it all. I'm here as a tool. I am as much mechanical as that lump of geth in the hold. His legion is the geth collective. My legion are my puppeters that use me. What happens if I win this whole thing? What then? The tool is useless. What if they can just shut me off. What if there's a button they can just flip and it's dark again."

Joker thought about making a joke, but turned from it. 

"Jane, I don't know why Liara did what she did. To be honest I like the girl, but I don't get her thought process sometimes. As far as being a tool. I think that's true to a degree. But. You knew that when you laced up those boots the first time and took your oath."

She looked up at him and swiped at a very angry tear. Her face looking a bit confused and angry. 

"Jeff, this is turning into a terrible pep talk."

He held his hands out in defense. "Just hear me out."

She sighed and looked back at him.

"You save people. It's what you do. What you fail to see is once you save them, they create a net around you. You saved me. You saved Garrus. You saved Tali. You give people back what makes them...well them. I don't know if someone can flip a switch and shut you off. But you wanna know what I do know?"

She looked at him catching his eyes again.

"I know the answer you'll get if you ask yourself one simple question. If they do have their hand on the switch, would you rather go out with the love and laughs you'll get from this life or would you rather it had never happened? Would you rather the switch had been left off and you never know the smile and feelings that come up when Garrus cracks one of his deadpan jokes. Would you rather never known what getting caught making out with your turian boyfriend in a sleazy nightclub on Omega felt like? Would you rather have never met Kasumi and laughed with her about you walking in heels for the first time in I'm assuming ever? Would you rather have never taken me to the range and had me believing I was a decent shot? Would you rather lost and not gained back what you have now and just lost instead?"

Jane listened and blinked. She took a deep breath and stood up. Dusting herself off she nodded.

"I'd rather have not been terrified by your profound monologue on my life. I'm a little freaked out now and think I need a shower and stiff drink."

She winked at him and smiled.

Jeff turned his seat around and began tapping on the console. "I'm sure you can find something stiff, I mean if you….I'll shut up."

Jane laughed and headed to the elevator.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks guys for being patient. I had some business trips to handle and finally got back only to get the flu. Anyway, here is the latest installment. It's almost done and then it will be time to move on to the other stories I have in mind.
> 
> Hope you guys are liking it so far!


	27. Finding Calm Before the Storm

Jane walked to her cabin in a daze. She noticed and registered that the crew was gone, but it was like she was in a dream. She stepped into the cabin without really thinking about anything. Her clothing coming off slowly and into the normal pile it made near her bathroom door so she could grab it on her way out of the shower and toss it to the laundry. She stood under the hot water letting it run down her spine, over her shoulders, anywhere where she could feel the heat and forget everything even if it was for a moment. The shower didn't last long. She reached around to turn off the valve and blinked for a moment. She could have sworn she heard something. She shook it off.

Grabbing her towel she brought it to her hair to dry the trendles that hung in long wet curls. She stopped short and sniffed her hair then her towel. She could swear she smelled sandalwood. Just a hint of it. It was comforting and soothed her just enough to let her tension relax from her for a moment. She tossed on her lounging clothes and stepped into the main room jumping slightly.

Garrus stood in front of her in what appeared to be a date night style outfit. Not totally casual, but not black tie either. He was holding a bottle of mid grade wine they could both drink. She smiled as he fumbled with his words and with his stance. Oh man, he really was lost in this. She was caught between throwing him a bone and just smirking a bit. She decided to meet him halfway.

"Whoa. Consider me seduced smooth talker. Now shut up and stop worrying." She smiled and took the wine, putting it on the table and stepped over to turn off the music that was blaring through her cabin. She found it oddly sweet that he was worrying. She thought of both of them, he would have it totally together and calm. Turned out they were both nervous sexually charged wrecks. Good to know.

She turned back around to Garrus looking so serious. 

"I've seen so much go wrong Shepard. My work at C-Sec, what happened with Sidonis…."

Jane began moving towards him. Slowly at first. Just to stand near him. To feel him. She could smell him. It was the sandalwood she had smelled when she got out of the shower. The sandalwood she smelled when she met him for the first time in the presidium. The sandalwood she smelled when he grabbed her on Tuchanka and pulled her into cover. The same exact smell of sandalwood that was all over both of them when they got caught at Afterlife. She took in a deep breath as he continued.

"I just want something to go right. Just once...Just…"

She reached her hand up to the scars on the side of his face. The scars she felt were her fault. Had she been more careful, paid more attention, done just a little more…. She didn't know what to say as she looked into this eyes. He lifted his gaze to hers and she felt it. She knew. They both needed to be each others spark. They both needed to be that spark in the sky that keeps you going, keeps you warm, and keeps you grounded. They were the one thing the other could do right. He was the first step she could take for herself that she could believe in. Beyond the military. Beyond her rank. 

She knew it was customary for his people to show affection by leaning in and touching foreheads. She moved slowly at first, wondering if he would meet her halfway. She smiled softly to herself as he did. At the moment their foreheads touched, she felt a spark light within her. His hand reached up and began a soft trail along her arm. 

She looked up to his gaze, biting her bottom lip slightly. He smiled softly and she saw the visor he was still wearing flicker.

"You're beautiful." He whispered softly. 

She smiled and went to say something just as she felt his lips close in on hers. The kiss was soft, slow, and exactly what they both needed. He didn't push her and she didn't become too assertive. She closed her eyes and realized they were moving together, not at her pace or his, but at theirs. She felt him end the kiss softly and pull back. Garrus was breathing heavy, his heart racing, his hands were shaking slightly.

She smiled and caught her own breath. She looked at him and let out a small laugh. She saw his visor blink.

"Are you monitoring my vitals with that thing?" 

He chuckled and nodded as she popped his arm.

"No fair Vakarian. You don't get help on this one." She reached up and took the visor off as he helped her. 

"Aww come on. I had it set to record. No fun Shepard." He laughed as he took the visor and sat it down on the night table next to her bed. Turning he looked at her. 

He cleared his throat and began walking to her. "You know, I should be nervous. We should be nervous. I should be worried about everything from what I say to how you touch me and how I touch you. I'm not worried. I'm not nervous. That said. I meant what I said a few minutes ago. I do want something to go right. I want that to be you Jane. i want us…..to be right."

He stood looking at her. He let his words hang in the air. 

She took a breath, opened her mouth, then took another breath. She blinked when Garrus laughed.

"Oh wow. By the spirits. Is the great Jane Shepard rendered speechless? Wait, let me grab my visor and record this. No one will believe me." He chuckled as he walked towards her with his arms outstretched. To his delight, she stepped right into them, wrapping her arms around him.

"I can't promise anything Garrus. We may not come back from this. But, i can say this. I want us to be right for as long as we can. I don't want to just blow off steam. I hope that's what you meant by being right."

He nodded and lifted her chin with his talon. "Yes, that's….exactly what i meant."

He moved towards her again and began to kiss her slowly. His mouth slowly opening to hers. When her mouth opened and her tongue touched his, he let out a deep guttural moan. His arms went around her tighter and she felt his heartbeat against hers. The kissing intensified to an animalistic level. She was nibbling at him, running her nails over his neckline, chest, fringe, and anywhere she could reach. He answered in kind with nibbling at her neck, running his nails down her arms and back, and nibbling at her lips. 

He took the first move to the bed. She paused for a quick second and then followed him. He stopped them just as he felt his leg hit the side of the bed. Stepping back, it occurred to him that she had probably not been with a turian. He decided to help her since the clothing could be tricky. He moved slowly as he moved his shirt off letting her see how he moved it off his body revealing his arms and chest. Tossing his shirt on the floor he leaned in kissing her again, gently. 

She followed his lead and began to remove her clothing as she kissed him. He noticed her kissing started to slow and she started to pull back. He ended the kiss softly and stepped back looking her over.

"Second thoughts?" Garrus' voice was soft and almost reassuring. He ran a talon down her arm and kept his breathing as calm as he could.

"I just. I don't know what you are used to. You said once that humans did nothing for you. I…"

He smiled and moved her to sit down with him on the bed. He reached out his hand to touch her thigh, letting his talons rub gently on her leg.

"So, story time for a minute. When I first got to the Citadel, I had about a year where I ran a little wild. Okay, a lot. I was working, but I hadn't really been around anyone other than turians. I dated around and experimented with damn near everything. Keep in mind, turians aren't as strict on personal choices as human society. We don't look badly on experimentation in our personal lives. I went out with and dated a few asari women. So, as far as what I am used to? Unless you are actually a krogan under those clothes, I'm good."

She nodded and actually blushed. She shook her head and took his hand in hers. She quirked an eyebrow and watched him as he leaned in. His hands moved to the hem of her shirt. He slowly moved it up and over hear head. As shirt came off, he leaned in kissing her neck and nibbling just a bit. When she shuddered and let out a soft moan he chuckled against her neck, placing a soft kiss before moving to her ear.

"I like that sound." He whispered letting his warm breath trail along her earlobe.

She reached down as she tilted her neck to his mouth. Her hands moved quickly and removed her bra, letting it fall to the floor alongside their shirts. The moment her skin was bare, she felt the light touch of his hands moving around from her flat stomach to her back and up her spine. Her body responded with another shudder and another moan. This time the moan was deeper and more primale.

He let out a breathy laugh against her skin as he laid her back on the black and silver sheets of the bed. Moving his body over hers, he pushed one leg between hers. She moved her legs giving him enough room to be comfortable. Her hands moved down his shoulders, his spine, to his waist. Garrus moved his lips to hers, but this time the kiss wasn't as gentle. It was hungry, needy, almost greedy. She opened her mouth to him giving him back as much as he gave to her.

Her nails trailed along his waist and gripped tightly causing him to thrust his hips into her grinding against her. They both moaned when her hips responded in kind. His hand reached down and began to move along her pants. His fingers and talons pushing them down off her hips giving him access to her. Jane helped remove them and kicked them onto the floor. Her legs moved to allow him to fit perfectly over her. Her right knee moved against his leg causing him to be the one to shudder now. 

"Spirits Jane. You're so warm. So soft." He whispered as he kissed down her neck to her breasts. She gasped out grabbing to him, bringing her legs up on either side of him, as his mouth found her nipple. His tongue began to work against her hardening one nipple then moving to the next. He let out a soft almost purring sound as he moaned against her skin. His hands moving down her body.

His talons ran across her thigh and between her legs. When his fingers reached her wetness he let out a guttural almost primale moan. It was deep, loud, and filled the dark room around them. It was the most arousing thing she had ever heard. Her hips pushed to him urgently as one of his fingers moved along her clit then inside of her.

She gasped as a second finger joined. "That's my girl. Is this for me Jane? Is this all for me? Tell me it's for me."

Each time he made a statement his fingers moved and curved inside of her causing her to gasp and rendering her nearly speechless.

Her nails dug into his back and she gasped hard cumming on his fingers, gripping her nails into his back. His fingers slowed and he pulled them slowly from her. Resting his head against her neck he brought his hand to her lips, moaning when she tooks his fingers into her mouth. Her tounge against his talons and fingers was all it took.

He reached down frantically unfastening the buckle to his pants and kicking them off quickly. She heard the clank of the buckles on the floor as the pants joined the rest of the clothes. She wasn't sure what to expect exactly. He must have known that. He took his hand from her mouth and moved it down, taking hold of one of her hands. Moving their hands together, he placed her hand on his stomach then moved them down further. Jane could feel his plates shift and she moaned loudly as she felt his rigid cock. 

It was unlike a human male cock in the sense that it was thicker, longer, and had ridges that were not what she was used to. She looked in his eyes as he guided her hand around his shaft. Showing her how to work him, he groaned placing his forehead against hers. 

"That's my girl. Mmm, faster baby. Faster Jane. Put me in you. That's my girl. Put me…."

He let out a near growl when he felt her put his cock at her entrance and push her hips to him. He responded by pushing in her in one thrust. One full thick long thrust into her wetness.

She groaned out, moving her hands back around him gripping him. Her legs went up around his waist and pulled him into her. 

"Garrus! Spirits. Harder. I need it Garrus. Make me feel you. Let me feel you all over me, in me. Let me feel…."

Her words were cut off by his mouth on hers as he began thrusting faster and harder inside of her. He moved his hands to grab hers and put them over her head. Placing his forehead to hers he began pumping in her with deep long thrusts. She could feel his breath against her mouth.

"Feel me Jane. Do you feel me? I'm yours. For as long as we have. This is yours. All of it. All of me. Feel it Jane. Cum for me baby."

She moaned out and felt an emotional release unlike any other she had ever had. Her hips moved in time with his. Her body moving with him in one fluid motion. She groaned loudly not caring who could hear them. Her mouth kissing and nibbling at any part of him she could. As he sped up so did she. 

He began pumping faster and harder in her. He could feel her clenching around him. Saying each others' name at the same time they both began pulsing. His cock buried inside of her, her warmth wrapped around him tight.

They shuddered, cumming hard, cumming together. FInally, collapsing in heavy breaths and soft kisses. He slowly pulled out of her and rolled to his back bringing her with him. She settled into the crook of his arm, shivering slightly from the aftershocks, her hand on his chest. She felt him gripping her tighter to him.

Her breathing slowed and he smiled softly as his talons ran through her hair and along her scalp. He realized a few short minutes later that she had fallen asleep. He laid there for a moment, looking up in the skylight at the galaxy passing over. His breathing began to slow and his last thoughts before drifting off himself where that if this was a dream, if this were some fantasy come to life, that he never wanted to wake up.


	28. Holding On to Hope

Garrus woke up and immediately felt the warm weight of Jane. She was laying on his chest and arm sleeping soundly. He took in a breath and pulled her closer. The feel of her, the smell of her, her kisses, and every touch was perfect. He had always imagined finding someone. He wondered what she would be like and feel like. He wondered how she would make him feel. He never expected to feel this wonderful. He closed his eyes and silently thanked the spirits for the road that had lead to this moment. 

He knew that the next stop was likely death. The mission was a suicide mission if he had ever faced one. He usually went in with at least some optimism, but it was hard on this one. He had run the little bit they knew through his head. There was no tactic, no way, nothing he could think of in his training and experience that worked out to a good sign in this. He had even made final plans for everything. Insurance policies to cover his family, especially his mother's treatment, had been handled. A will had been left with the Turian hierarchy as per custom. He had even taken a moment and left a letter, along with a small amount of items, to Jane if she lived and he did not.

He didn't realize it, but as he thought of it his arms went tighter around her and his hand moved up and down her arms softly. He kissed the top of her head and slowly removed himself from the bed. He stood slowly and looked at her sleeping form on the sheets. Spirits she was beautiful. He felt a tug on his heart. The best case scenario he could think of is that they both end up at that bar beyond the veil. The thought of living without her again tore him. The thought of her living without him and moving on equally tore him.

It struck him, as he made his way to the shower, that he wasn't even sure what she would be moving on from. This was supposed to be blowing off steam. A one nighter at best. Then right before it started they both agreed they wanted more than one night, if things turned out well on this mission. He had to wonder if that was just wishful thinking or kind words coming from knowing that they would likely not make it out. The reality of that statement? Well, that was waiting to be seen. 

He stepped into the shower and for a moment took in the items that were not standard issue. The special shampoo, body wash, even the personal items. He took in what scents they were. For a moment, he imagined his items next to hers. What it would look like, feel like, be like to be part of her life in that way. He shook it off telling himself to let it go. 

He stepped out of the shower, toweled off, and tossed on some clothes. She was still asleep. He moved to the bed and picked up his visor. Taking a soft intake of breath he reached a finger up and tapped the side of the visor turning it on. He focused in on her as he sat down on a chair. The visor began reading her vitals. He smiled softly to himself. She was calm. For the first time in weeks she was calm and peaceful. He knew because during firefights he kept his visor fixed on her. Partly because she was the Commander. Partly because she was a teammate and the best shot next to him. The larger part, if he admitted it, was because of how he felt about her.

He turned off the vitals and sat quietly as she rolled over. The sheet was covering her perfectly in a sweeping motion over her breasts, stomach, and just above her mid thigh. Her hair was loose and tousled around her head and over one shoulder. Her face was peaceful with a small smile on her face. He knew he probably shouldn't, but he reached up and tapped the visor. The image froze in the viewscreen then quickly swept to the side with a note that it had been saved. 

By the spirits, regardless of what happened on this mission, he would have at least one moment caught in time of her. One moment that was just his.

 

About an hour later, as he sat reading, his omnitool went off. Joker sent a message. They were approaching the relay. ETA one hour.

Garrus stood up and moved to the bed. Sitting down on the side next to Jane he ran his talons over her hair moving it gently. He whispered softly to her.

"Jane? Honey." He let his hand run over her shoulder and back up. He waited and she didn't stir. He slid his hand back down to her side. 

"Jane? Sweetie...it's time." He was about to move his hand when she reached out and took his hand in hers. 

Her eyes never opened. He let her guide his hand under the silk sheet and to her core. His eyes closed and he groaned. She was warm, wet, and like silk. She guided his hand as her legs moved open, showing him just how she liked to be touched. He let her guide him before sliding a talon inside of her wetness. She moaned loudly as her hips rose off the bed to his touch. Her other hand shot out and reached for his cock. He quickly helped her and took his pants off exposing himself to her. 

"Touch me Jane." He whispered into the dark room as her hand grasped him and began to stroke.

He continued to pump her gently watching her body rise and fall to his touch. Loving the feel, the sound of her, everything about her. His head was swimming. He could barely comprehend that this was happening. She turned her head and opened her eyes slowly. She smiled and softly spoke.

"Make love to me Garrus. Just one more time...just once before….."

That was all she got out. He moved so quickly it took her breath away. He moved beside her, laying down over her. He slid between her thighs and moaned as his cock touched her, rubbing against her clit. He braced himself and paused. His hands moved over her face as he scanned her eyes. He looked at her, taking in every aspect of her. He wanted to say so much in that moment.

Jane was looking back at him. Her eyes fixed on his. She could feel him at her core and wanted, no needed, him inside of her. She needed to feel him inside of her, filling her up. She needed his breath on her body, his lips on her skin, and his touch all over her. She wrapped her legs around him crossing her ankles just at the middle of his ass.

Her arms went around him and she allowed her nails to run along his neck. He groaned and arched, sliding into her halfway. "Garrus….I…." He leaned down and kissed her, sliding in all the way, and cutting off her words. He began pumping into her slowly. His hand moving to her thigh pulling her leg up on his hip more letting him get deeper into her. 

She gasped letting her lips open to him. Her tongue moved into his mouth as he groaned. Their hips moving together. She grabbed to his neck and his eyes shot open. Their foreheads touching, eyes locked on each other, hips moving as one. He held her face in his hands, kept his eyes on hers. Jane moaned and moved to bite her bottom lip to stop from moaning. Garrus, reached and shook his head no.

"No baby. Let me hear you. Let me hear how good you feel."

Jane looked in his eyes and felt her chest tighten. She had found peace. She had found everything she wanted in the arms of this amazing man. Turian didn't matter to her. This man was everything she had ever wanted or needed. Her best friend, her lover, and now she knew he had her heart to. She arched to him faster and harder. She gripped him harder and he did the same in return. As she looked in his eyes and he returned the look all she could think is what it would be like to not have him there. He thrusted in her and said her name. Pulsing and pumping faster. She relaxed and gave in cumming hard on his cock getting a moan and whisper of something in turian into her ear. They laid there in each others arms, breathing heavy, holding, and gripping to what they were both afraid wouldn't be there after this mission.


	29. The Peaceful Path

They went through the relay, rescued the crew, took down the collectors, and walked out the other side. It was nothing short of amazing. Everyone made it out. No crew casualties. As they all made it back to the Normandy, you could see that no one really knew how to handle a suicide mission that ended in life. 

Jane walked through to the CIC and into the conference room. Garrus and Joker looked at each other for a moment. Garrus didn't need to say a word as he stepped outside the room and waited. A few minutes later, Jane stormed out, reaching up and ripping the Cerberus patch off. Joker went to stand up, but Garrus waved a hand at him to let him know he was taking care of it. He had to almost jog to catch up to her before the elevator doors closed. 

He didn't say a word to her. She punched at the control panel for her cabin. On the way, she crossed her arms and tossed her back against the wall. Her head turned halfway and she looked at him out of the corner of her eye. The door opened and she pushed herself off the wall towards the door to the cabin.

"Don't say it. I'm thinking it. Just don't say it." She roared as she walked through the door, taking her helmet throwing her helmet into the room. It hit the wall and flew off bouncing into the room. She turned and watched as he ran a hand over the lock to the door and came in. Neither of them had a shower yet. They both were covered in blood, sweat, dirt, and anything else that was in that damn place. The Normandy was still in the area, needing serious repairs to even limp into the relay again. 

"Say what? The I told you so? I can't because I didn't. In fact, I'd have to say it to myself if i said it to you." He said in a tone that she found comforting, no matter how pissed she was. He had a voice that she noticed he used with her and others he was comfortable with. The difference was, that with her, there was a slight tone change that was reserved...she hoped...just for her.

He sat down on the chair and looked up at her. "In fact, instead of saying don't do it, I said let me go with you. I said i am with you."

She turned around, as she tugged on her lip. He smiled. He loved that she did that. It was something quirky about her that he adored. He reached out and put his hands on her hips pulling her slowly to him. She let him, much to his delight. He wasn't sure she would. He rubbed her hips and sides and looked up at her.

"Tell me what you want to do. Tell me what you need to do. Tell me, hell Jane, tell me anything. I'm here. For as long as you want me. I'm here." it was the closest he would get to saying how he felt about her. It was the closest he would get to saying the three words he wanted to say.

"Garrus. I'm not Alliance Navy anymore. I'm not Cerberus anymore. I'm just Jane Shepard. I don't know where Jane Shepard is going right now. I don't know what I'm going to do. Asking you to be here, to walk through that with me, it isn't fair. It's not fair to you." She put her hands on his shoulders and looked down at him. 

He stood up and took her face in his hands. He looked at the small cuts on her, the areas that were starting to bruise, the dried blood. "Jane, you are the most important thing to me right now. You may not be alliance or cerberus, but those groups aren't important to me. You are. You. Jane Shepard. What would be unfair is you never letting me be by your side again, to never see you again, to never hear you again. Asking me to stand by you, no matter where the path, that's my hope. You are my hope."

Jane looked into his eyes. She didn't know what to say. She said the truth. "I don't know what to do with that. I've never been one persons hope. Everyone's a few time, but not just one person. I'm usually a bit of a disappointment on a one on one." 

She smiled a bit. He leaned down, kissing her gently and tenderly. "Get used to it. Get used to this. I'm here Jane. For the long haul. Good or bad. No strings. I'm here."

Jane smiled at him kissing him back. "You sir, appear to need a shower."

He smiled and chuckled. "You'll have to show me the way. I think i may need guidance."

She chuckled, took his hand, and lead him to the showers. It was finally time for her to rest a moment. It was tie for her to get used to the peace she had found after the storm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for sticking with me through this ride. If you are reading this prequel followed by Fire on the Horizon...i hope it flows well and that you enjoy the ride through the romance. Thanks again guys and look for upcoming fanfics featuring femshep.


End file.
